Fucking roomate.

culinaryoverlord

The dude has taken to sleeping on the couch in the living room, as I try to post myself to sleep, he is laying there snoring like a hog, fuck I think he is choking on his own tongue, if he dies, so be it. I could just go to my room, but this is my spot, I sit at the kitchen table and do my totse stuff until I can't stay awake anymore, then I go to bed. It is the living room for fuxxake, not the 'get loaded on cheap beer and pass out with the TV blaring late night ads while snoring like a drunk leper' room, thats his room, the one with the bed, where he should be sleeping. I wonder what would happen if I put a pillow over his face, fuck his phone is going off and he is not even budging. Oh he's up, and down again, "wow you're up late", asshole. I hope he dies and that scabies ridden pitt he calls a pet eats him. Dude was just bragging up his bed too, $1500 pillow top single coil dreamland 7000, or what fucking ever. Yes by all means pass out on the cheap 'sort of leather' couch, where any exposed skin becomes glued to the synthetic cowhide. "Yah, it's real leather, cost me a bundle", we found it on craigslist for $60, hope it grows teeth and eats the fucker.

C/O
"fuck, I need a BJ, but it's gonna be a joint and DFG's jailbait tonight"

Darth Beaver

Can you imagine if it was called a "get loaded on cheap beer and pass out with the TV blaring late night ads while snoring like a drunk leper' room". Rent would go up all over the country just to cover the cost of the extra lines in classified ads.

Spacious 3 bed 2/12 bath with 'get loaded on cheap beer and pass out with the TV blaring late night ads while snoring like a drunk leper room overlooking lake. $1600/m+Dep &2yr Lse

Sorry but that description cracked me up.

GoingNowhere

You need to tell him then mate who actually owns the property, or do you both rent it out?

Pacino

you should have unprotected gay bum sex with him on the couch in question

BigHarryDick

I can tell someone has the roommate blues.

i used to live with a couple of roommates once. and at first it was cool as hell

staying with your buddies. Until you realize how fucking slobbish they are or the little

shit you hate they do on a normal basis. Best thing to do is Take some time away somewhere.

I used to get a cheap hotel on the weekends and just stay there come back refreshed and start over.

best thing to do is beat him to his fav. spots and take over your kingdom with your style!