Abyss AKA "My First Time"

SlartibartfastSlartibartfast Global Moderator-__-
edited February 2012 in Life
Hello. I've never posted in here before. This is my true "virginity lost" story. Technically it's was a blowjob, but i regard it as my first time.

I was about 12 at the time. I lost it to the sweet Russian girl who lived next door. She had that red-blonde ragdoll
hair you only find in Russian women and was incredibly thin. I remember being awed at how thin she was. She was very
pale, the kind of skin women try to emulate with make-up and powders. A little older than me, about 13 i
think. Although this was just over ten years ago, 13 year olds back then (at lease in my memory) were not as sexually
liberal as they are now. We were both children.

I would often visit her house, mainly to eat, she enjoyed making food for me and i enjoyed letting her do it. On
weekends and after school we would lounge around her veranda and play "truth or dare" or ride out bikes and have
picnics at the creek. She had a pet ferret that i was always a little frightened of. It was a strange pet for a girl
but she enjoyed it and i thought it was better than a cat.

They were a well to do family despite the fact that her father was perpetually unemployed. The man was always
shirtless, either lying on the couch or in his bed drinking for an endless supply of whisky samplers. I've always
wondered were he got them. Her mother was the most sickly women i had ever known. She had short trim hair and was
always in the kitchen making soups. I later found out that she died of heart complications. Her step sister also
lived with them, the child of her father. I didn't know it at the time but she was, *in hindsight an obvious
dyke and definitely looked like one. I had tea at their house one afternoon; they were the type of family who puts
plastic mats underneath their plates and eat in dead silence.

Even then it was obvious she was destined to lead a bohemian life.

She would often lead me in her room and force me to listen to classical music. She was learning to play the flute and
apparently listening to classical helped. It was nearly always Prokofiev and exclusively 'peter and the wolf'. To
this day i can't listen to the main piece without feeling a sense of arousal. Sometimes we would listen to
Tchaikovsky (who I've always preferred). Always Russians.

It was during one of these sessions that we got a little busy. We were lying in the middle of her carpeted room lit
by the dim bulb of her desk lamp.The curtains were drawn and the door was closed, we were both facing the stereo
system and drawing what we thought the music looked like (this is what her expensive tuition asked her to do for
homework). My page looked like the results of a failed lie-detector test. I glanced at her page and she had drawn
rainbows, flowers a lot of other girly stuff. As i glanced at her something inside me sunk. It was literally a
sinking feeling. An overwhelming sense of sadness. At that point all i wanted to do was hug her and just get as close
to her body as i could.

Now, almost half a *lifetime later i find it difficult to articulate the feelings of my child self without
projecting my adult experiences on the situation. If you were to ask me whether sexual desire was playing a role in
my thoughts i could not tell you for certain. Certainly at that point i was aware of sex and had the usual apocryphal
understanding an ordinary 11 year old slowly accumulates through overheard conversations and hastily switched TV
channels but, as for any desire, it would be an embellishment for me to suggest that i had anything more than a
passing interest in the subject.

I believe over the years of knowing her i had began to regard her as my girlfriend and although i had no real
understanding of meaningful relationships other than that of paternal nurturing, i was definitely aware that i
enjoyed being around her. perhaps i even enjoyed looking at her.

Even at that age i was not a person who would acted on impulse, but i found myself wiggling towards her. She
(perhaps instinctively) reciprocated and our bare feet began to touch.Her tiny feminine feet were scraping the sides
of mine. I intensely enjoyed this. I glanced at her face trying to decipher what she was thinking. She had a vacant
smile on her lips and seemed blissfully unaware of my thoughts. Was i a little older, i would have likely looked at
this display of ignorance with amused disbelief.

We stayed like that for a couple of minutes staring at the shadows projected in the cieling by her desk lamp, half
asleep just enjoying each others contentment. She was wearing a shirt that had grown just a little to small for her
and while she was lying there sprawled on the floor her stomach had become visible. The sight of her waist enchanted
me. I was definitely physically aroused at this point. I moved towards her stomach and kissed it. At this she jumped
up a little surprised at the sensation, i laughed a little and kissed her again, this time higher. She again
trembled. I began to kiss her all over, enjoying the reaction my lips were invoking in the girl. Her back was
beginning to arch and her breathe was coming out in short gasps. It was definitely not an orgasm - i had confined my
embraces to her stomach and chest. It think it was more like the deflated feeling you get at the end of a hysterical

I soon got bored of this and just lay there next her, smelling the scent of her hair. She was on her back with her
arm on my elbow (every women i have known intimately has done that) After a few minutes of lethargic silence, she
turned on her side and gave me a kiss. She was aiming for my mouth, but kissed my nose instead. She giggled and tried
again. I will never forget the moment her lips touched mine. I'm sure it will be the last thing i remember before i
enter the abyss. I was surprised at how warm it was. At how warm she was. I started to get goosebumps on my side's
and across my back.

It was a simple peck. Neither of us knew any advanced forms of kissing, but in my ignorance i was satisfied. She must
have noticed this. "let me do it again" she said. It was the first time she spoke. *"OK". She kissed me again, this
time i held her there. I think it was a few extra seconds. I cannot accurately remember. When she parted she was
flushed, and a wry smile was on her face. She was a radiating and full of feminine power.

"you kiss me" she whispered. "OK" i replied, not understanding the difference. Without any forethought, I was on all
fours and on top of her. Supporting my weight with my arms, i bent down a little and kissed her. I understood the
difference. i repeated this a couple of times, on her mouth, her forehead and cheeks. I taken aback by the beauty my
shadow cast on her face and the rhythmic sway that seemed to naturally set on both of us.

It was at this point that she must have noticed my erection because her eyes began to venture south. I was on top of
her and my crotch was exacting pressure of her left leg. It must have felt uncomfortable to her.

I got off her and went back to her side, I was content for the night and would have gladly left, happy with what we
had done. She on the other hand was not ready to call an end to the entertainment. As i lay next to her, she began to
brush her hands against my body. With the benefit of experience it was clear that she was interested in my erection.
I was not yet versed in the seductive arts of women and just ignored it.

Eventually she got her hands were she wanted and she began rubbing the bulge. As she was doing this she looked
straight at me. The girl was a natural. As i stared into her no longer innocent and now shrewd eyes, i decided that i
didn't really want to leave. I placed my hand on the top of hers and guided her movements. Neither of us knew what we
were doing, but i was in ecstasy. I felt as if i was in a vacuum, i was blind to everything but her and the intense
sense of pleasure that was coming out of my entire being.

I would have continued this for hours but after a while she must have started feeling self-conscious. She removed her
hand from mine and placed in on the side of her waist. The palm of her hand was facing upwards, probably a little
frightened at the intense power it seemed to hold.
She glanced at me for a second and said "show me".
I blinked. "huh?"
"you know..let me see"
"what?" not daring to believe what had come out of her mouth.
"take off your shorts" she said, sounding annoyed.
"OK" i replied a little hoarse.
I removed my shorts.
"and your underwear stupid"
"oh yeah. sorry"
I removed it and sat there with my erection not even daring to think of what was going to happen next. She kept her
eyes on it for a few seconds. I was not circumcised.

"My dad's is red on top" she said. I had no idea what she was talking about.
"That's nice".
"and bigger" she teased.
"oh" i said a little embarrassed.

She crept closer and put her hands around the shaft. I was expecting her to jerk me off, instead she bent down and
kissed the top half of it. Although i was erect before, at the sight of her lips on my penis I was painfully rock
hard. I was dumbfounded, speechless and a little dizzy. She looked up at at me and started giggling, probably at the
expression on my face. I was a little annoyed at that, she must have noticed because she kissed it a few
more times, at each embrace my penis would jerk up involuntarily.

By now, my foreskin had started to retract not being able to withstand the size of my erection. She saw this and
looked at it quizzically but she figured it out fast enough. Her hands gently pulled the foreskin all the way back.
"That's better" She was talkative. I would grow to hate women who talked through blow-jobs.

She still had all her clothes on and was sitting in front me with her legs crossed. She looked up at me and then put
the entire head in her mouth. I blew my load almost instantly. She was freaked out by it, and instantly spat as much
of it out as she could. She was flushed and a little of my cum was on her chin. It was a fantastic sight but she
didn't like the experience at all.

That was the end of the blow-job and the end of the fun, she went int the bathroom to clean up and i put my clothes
back on. When she came back, It was obvious she felt awkward about what had happened. She wanted to to keep it a
secret, i agreed, i had no one to tell anyway. After a few minutes of awkward silence, it was obvious that i should

Things were never the same between us after that. We would hang out in her room often enough, it always lead to the
same thing. I eventually had 'proper' vaginal sex with her, she was not a novice and had been experimenting with sex
toys for a while, but eventually we just stopped. We both got a little older, she became the typically beautiful
princess and got to know a lot of vain people, she had every guy in school wrapped around her fingers.

I went more with the nerdy crowd. The "functional clothing", card collecting, video games type. I was given more
respect than they had though...mainly because i wasn't a complete social failure, got good grades and wasn't shabby

I never told anyone about our nights together. Very few people would have believed me and there was always the risk
of being beaten up by one of her jock boyfriends. Although sometimes i would bump into her with some braindead guy, i
could never resist flashing her a big grin and a knowing wink. *

No i don't think she was molested by her dad.


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