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Burglars snort man's ashes, thinking they were cocaine

UnknownUnknown
edited January 2011 in Spurious Generalities
MIAMI (Reuters) - Burglars snorted the cremated remains of a man and two dogs in the mistaken belief that they had stolen illegal drugs, Florida sheriff's deputies said on Wednesday.

The ashes were taken from a woman's home in the central Florida town of Silver Springs Shores on December 15. The thieves took an urn containing the ashes of her father and another container with the ashes of her two Great Danes, along with electronic equipment and jewelry, the Marion County Sheriff's Office said.

Investigators learned what happened to the ashes after they arrested five teens in connection with another burglary attempt at a nearby home last week.

"The suspects mistook the ashes for either cocaine or heroin. It was soon discovered that the suspects snorted some of the ashes believing they were snorting cocaine," the sheriff's report said.

Once they realized their error, the suspects discussed returning the remaining ashes but threw them in a lake instead because they thought their fingerprints were on the containers, sheriff's spokesman Judge Cochran said.

Police divers were trying to recover the ashes. The suspects were jailed on numerous burglary and other charges.

http://nz.entertainment.yahoo.com/news/article/-/8680654/burglars-snort-mans-ashes-thought-it-was-cocaine/


Some people sure are stupid. Who the fuck keeps cocaine in an URN anyway? :facepalm:
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Comments

  • Professor ElmProfessor Elm Regular
    edited January 2011
    Lmao. You may laugh, but an Urn is a great place to keep cocaine. If you get raided, they arent going to be bad mannered enough to search a pot that is meant for cremated people.
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  • FATTY_MCFUCKFACEFATTY_MCFUCKFACE Regular
    edited January 2011
    She kept her dog's ashes?
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  • UnknownUnknown
    edited January 2011
    Professor Elm wrote: »
    Lmao. You may laugh, but an Urn is a great place to keep cocaine. If you get raided, they arent going to be bad mannered enough to search a pot that is meant for cremated people.

    I'm pretty sure if you got raided, they'd search every nook and cranny, upturn your coffee table and pull the carpets up. Still, might be a good idea.

    Personally if I wanted to hide something really bad, I'd make a little safe-box, weatherproof it and keep it on the roof of my house.
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  • FATTY_MCFUCKFACEFATTY_MCFUCKFACE Regular
    edited January 2011
    Professor Elm wrote: »
    Lmao. You may laugh, but an Urn is a great place to keep cocaine. If you get raided, they arent going to be bad mannered enough to search a pot that is meant for cremated people.

    I think the cops would probably be smart enough to poke around the urn. I don't think they would dump it out though.
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  • UnknownUnknown
    edited January 2011
    FATTY_MCFUCKFACE wrote: »
    She kept her dog's ashes?

    What's even stranger is that she threw the dogs ashes in with the ashes of a dead man... Wouldn't it have made more sense to keep them separate?
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  • culinaryoverlordculinaryoverlord Regular
    edited January 2011
    Has anyone here ingested the ashes of a loved one? My cousin and I were thinking of making a couple of martinis with a sprinkling of our grandmothers ashes on them one night. Didn't do it, just felt strange, very heavy metal, but strange none the less.
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  • JestAJestA Regular
    edited January 2011
    culinaryoverlord wrote: »
    Has anyone here ingested the ashes of a loved one? My cousin and I were thinking of making a couple of martinis with a sprinkling of our grandmothers ashes on them one night. Didn't do it, just felt strange, very heavy metal, but strange none the less.

    Totally cannibal corpse.
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  • Darth BeaverDarth Beaver Meine Ehre heißt Treue
    edited January 2011
    trx100 wrote: »
    What's even stranger is that she threw the dogs ashes in with the ashes of a dead man... Wouldn't it have made more sense to keep them separate?

    The thieves took an urn containing the ashes of her father and another container with the ashes of her two Great Danes
    ^^^
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  • DirtySanchezDirtySanchez Regular
    edited January 2011
    This is what happens when you go around snorting any random powder you find:facepalm: Someone please mail these idiots some anthrax.
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  • blindbatblindbat Regular
    edited January 2011
    trx100 wrote: »
    Police divers were trying to recover the ashes. The suspects were jailed on numerous burglary and other charges.

    Some people sure are stupid. Who the fuck keeps cocaine in an URN anyway? :facepalm:

    :facepalm::facepalm: they sure are.
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  • Darth BeaverDarth Beaver Meine Ehre heißt Treue
    edited January 2011
    DirtySanchez wrote: »
    This is what happens when you go around snorting any random powder you find:facepalm: Someone please mail these idiots some anthrax.


    Once they get to prison I will gladly send them the callus scrapings frumunda ma fut.
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  • duuudeduuude Regular
    edited January 2011
    lol Great story. :thumbsup:

    Here's one of the losers that was involved :facepalm:

    soroawaldomugshot.jpg
    Waldo Soroa, 19
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  • VizierVizier Regular
    edited January 2011
    Hahahaha what a gigantic dumb faggot.
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  • DirtySanchezDirtySanchez Regular
    edited January 2011
    I'm not surprised that it was a mud involved.
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  • UnknownUnknown
    edited January 2011
    It looks like he's painted his eyebrows on :facepalm:
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  • FATTY_MCFUCKFACEFATTY_MCFUCKFACE Regular
    edited January 2011
    I found waldo!
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  • FATTY_MCFUCKFACEFATTY_MCFUCKFACE Regular
    edited January 2011
    The real problem with spics is their natural camouflage. They're not all as obvious as this bean chugger, I've seen some spics that could pass for white without the slightest difficulty. I can only imagine what it would be like to befriend one only to find out he is a sombrero wearing taco magnet months or years down the line.
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  • UnknownUnknown
    edited January 2011
    :mad:ijuana wrote: »
    Hahaha that was the best story i've heard all day :hai: Reminds me of that guy from the rolling stones (keith richards i think).

    Yeah, that's what I was thinking. He snorted his dad's ashes or something, didn't he?
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  • bornkillerbornkiller Administrator In your girlfriends snatch
    edited January 2011
    duuude wrote: »
    lol Great story. :thumbsup:

    Here's one of the losers that was involved :facepalm:

    soroawaldomugshot.jpg
    Haha! This story is funny but he looks funnier :D
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