Anger issues

nenglm · September 2011

So, i have a very serious case of anger issue and im trying to become a better person.
My theory atm is practice boxing with friends.

Why boxing?
Well, the way i see it is boxing teaches you how to control your anger and reflex.
In other words... thinking before i act.
Also its really hard to think clearly when adrenaline kicks in.
Kinda like when im arguing with people.
The way i see it, boxing is more mentality than physical.

If anyone else have any other ideas on how i can control my anger's. i'd really appreciate it.

ThirdRockFromTheSun · September 2011

I agree with you. Unfortunatly, I only have ways to release anger, instead of channeling it. I seem to have always had the ability to bottle things up, and release it at the appropriate time. Is there any possibility of you doing that?

Anyway, I suggest these, to maybe calm you down;
Suqeeze Ball
Punching Bag
Gum Chewing (I'm serious. I've seen it used, and seen it help on people who are angry/stressed)

If I think of anymore, I'll be sure to report back

nenglm · September 2011

thanks for the info,
i always bottle everything up aswell.
The problem is when my bottle is full i let everything out on the one's that i love and care about.
I'm not really material for anger management class as i dont burst out everyday, i just bottle it up and laugh about it.
But when someone i care about try and help me it triggers something in my mind that i cant control... i just burst out yelling and saying things i later regret.

RemadE · September 2011

I'm with you OP. Unfortunately I have to see someone as I have allowed my anger to overtake my powers of reason before (broken knuckles with an ASP baton and a crossbow used to threaten a nigger that fucked my chick). Funnily enough, both instances were to do with relationships.

But I digress. I'd love to take up boxing or some sort of disciplined martial arts. A mutual punch-the-fuck-out-of-eachother would do me a world of good. Currently, a workout, a walk and valium with the odd cigarette works for me. TDR has taught me a lot via TeamSpeak on concentration and mental states, as has Jug.

nenglm · September 2011

I never really thought of boxing as a disciplined martial arts until you mentioned it just now.
I'm not a cigarette person so that outs of the question lol,
I never really tried to do anything about my anger issues until just recently because of personal issues.
Here's the twisted part... Im suppose to protect my lover, but in the end i couldnt protect her from myself.
In others word i fucked up big time.
But i guess this was the kick that i needed to pursue a better life style.

Darth Beaver · September 2011

When you learn that your anger only really harms you in the long run it becomes easier to manage.

GoingNowhere · September 2011

Take Tai Chi mate, whats better than an hour or 2 of calm meditation? Personally, I think Martial arts like Karate or Kung Fu is better for that kind of thing. They teach you restraint and discipline, but not only that allows you to let of steam without going overboard. Being able to hit an opponent softly takes great skill and restraint, but is also satisfying because you know what would happen if you did hit hard. Same in life, its all about restraint and learning to control yourself

I probably would have kept the temper I had as a child if I had not done Karate, so I am very thankful.

nenglm · September 2011

i'll take that into consideration, but atm i prefer things i can do by myself at home.
Or something that doesnt cost that much money.
I'll probably try meditating, but i dont know if theres techniques or do i just close my eye for 2 hour and sleep lol.

Unknown · October 2011

^ Techniques for meditation exist, look them up on the internet. Whenever I feel enraged beyond belief, I just sit down for a bit and take a chiller. If not, go out for a walk and see where your legs take you. You'll soon forget how pissed you are and come to your senses.

Daktologist · October 2011

nenglm wrote: »

So, i have a very serious case of anger issue and im trying to become a better person.
My theory atm is practice boxing with friends.

Why boxing?
Well, the way i see it is boxing teaches you how to control your anger and reflex.
In other words... thinking before i act.
Also its really hard to think clearly when adrenaline kicks in.
Kinda like when im arguing with people.
The way i see it, boxing is more mentality than physical.

If anyone else have any other ideas on how i can control my anger's. i'd really appreciate it.

Sounds like me. I loose my temper over the most trivial things. I will tell you one thing though and that is going to anger management is a fucking waste of time, Even meditation doesn't help me. I normally go and get high and end up mellowing out for a few hours. That or smoking a cigarette will normally calm me down.

blamehoffman · October 2011

Ditto on the meditation thing; Zazen or TM work really well since prolonged sitting/deep breathing will really mellow you out. Also, think about the internal factors that make you angry, is it due to a sense of entitlement where you think the world owes you something? is it because you're really feeling threatened and dont know what else to do? If youre bottling it up, why do you do that? are you afraid of confrontation? It is very difficult to stop and really answer qeustions like this when they are about yourself, since we all like to look at ourselves with rose colored glasses.

I used to bottle up my anger because I was always afraid to stand up for myself, a condition known to the psychological community as beingapussyitice. I think that after years of being put down by my family and friends i develloped a cognitive distortion where I came to believe that anger in and of itself was wrong, and should simply be resisted. so for years when i was angry I would just hold it in but it does eventually come out and at the worst of times. Now Im learning how to have a healthy and balanced relationship with anger; im feeling it for waht it is (a necessary motivator) and even expressing it. At work recently I was being bullied by this douche who never shuts up and eventually I just let go and hit him once in the stomach. He doesnt bother me anymore. I dont reccomend using violence but some people will only respect you if you show them their boundaries and demonstrate the consequences for crossing them. One thing that reallly helped me was learning krav maga, it really helps with intimidation when you know that you could crush this persons testicles.

nenglm · October 2011

blamehoffman wrote: »

I used to bottle up my anger because I was always afraid to stand up for myself, a condition known to the psychological community as beingapussyitice. I think that after years of being put down by my family and friends i develloped a cognitive distortion where I came to believe that anger in and of itself was wrong, and should simply be resisted. so for years when i was angry I would just hold it in but it does eventually come out and at the worst of times. Now Im learning how to have a healthy and balanced relationship with anger; im feeling it for waht it is (a necessary motivator) and even expressing it. At work recently I was being bullied by this douche who never shuts up and eventually I just let go and hit him once in the stomach. He doesnt bother me anymore. I dont reccomend using violence but some people will only respect you if you show them their boundaries and demonstrate the consequences for crossing them. One thing that reallly helped me was learning krav maga, it really helps with intimidation when you know that you could crush this persons testicles.

Well said, this is exactly what i went through. My dumbass supervisor called me a dumbass for a mistake that he made
at the time i didnt want to fight but i did yell the fk outta him, old guy with heart condition and loves starting shit.
man i wish i kicked his ass before i quit.

Anger issues

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