Home› Spurious Generalities

Man, Tries To Turn Feces Into Gold, Ends Up In Jail

juggjugg Regular
edited October 2011 in Spurious Generalities
Paul Moran hatched a scheme to get rich quick by turning his own feces into gold, according to authorities in Northern Ireland. But like King Midas himself, Moran might have flushed his life down the drain in pursuit of his golden dreams.
Moran's attempts at alchemy crossed the line into arson when he set his apartment on fire after placing his feces on an electric heater, according to


http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/10/21/paul-moran-tries-to-turn-feces-into-gold_n_1024363.html
Share on Twitter

Comments

  • chippychippy <b style="color:pink;">Global Moderator</b>
    edited October 2011
    Moran's lawyer reportedly stated that his client is a smart man who has suffered from a drug problem.

    They omitted the most pertinent fact. He's Irish!
    Share on Twitter
  • Darth BeaverDarth Beaver Meine Ehre heißt Treue
    edited October 2011
    It sounds like his idea was hot shit to me.
    Share on Twitter
  • HelladamnleetHelladamnleet Banned
    edited October 2011
    ....... I'm in full agreement that this man should be jailed. He should also be killed. Stupid should be a crime.
    Share on Twitter
  • jehsiboijehsiboi Kanga Rump Ranga
    edited October 2011
    Stool's gold
    Share on Twitter
  • DfgDfg Admin
    edited October 2011
    Moran, more like Moron. Well, it would be funny if this was successful.
    Share on Twitter
  • angryonionangryonion Just some guy
    edited October 2011
    If only he was Dutch.
    Share on Twitter
  • dr rockerdr rocker Regular
    edited October 2011
    Last night I performed a magic act in which I encased everyone watching in rocks and minerals.

    The audience was in ore.
    Share on Twitter
  • jehsiboijehsiboi Kanga Rump Ranga
    edited October 2011
    I loled
    Share on Twitter
  • BurnBurn Regular
    edited October 2011
    Dr R, that got a laugh out of me.:thumbsup:

    Seriously though, who in their right mind would think superheated shit would turn into gold?

    Just like the old saying: You can paint a piece of shit, but it's a still a piece of shit.
    Share on Twitter
  • DfgDfg Admin
    edited October 2011
    I remember someone telling me about Sufism, according to them, these Sufi (people who bascially follow the path of Allah/Muhammad Teachings and don't focus on materialistic world, tend to shit real gold. The dirt on their nails when extracted turned into gold, the shit they took after getting dumbed would turn into gold. This is just to incite the sufi into taking the bait and trying to sell his shit). So, even though Moran's was just trying to use a very complex process to turn his bodily waste into gold, somewhere in Pakistan, in a small village some guy beleives that Sufi's in the old days can shit gold.
    Share on Twitter
Sign In or Register to comment.