Where's the wierdest place you masterbated?

BitterConflictBitterConflict Regular
edited August 2010 in Life
Well, it was my junior year in high school and right after school my mum decided to take me to Shopping Center. Right before my mum picked me up, I remember there was this very hot petite small Latina chick in my English class. She was in my thoughts for the entire day. Her image was embedded in my head. She dressed in a sexy tight fur jacket accompanied by tight jeans that exposed how curved her ass was. The dye for her hair matched her whole attire. Her color scheme was black and gold, and damn it was sexy. Her voice is adorable and she had the sexiest eyes to match her cute face. Throughout the whole ride, I kept thinking about pounding her tight curved small ass/pussy and kissing her passionately. I had a huge raging boner. By the time my mom and I arrived in the parking lot, I told her to go on without me. So, she went inside without me. As soon as I waited my mom to enter the mall, I quickly reach in my pocket and started to play pocket pool. I fucking fapped extremely hard for the next 3-5 minutes. I busted a nut in my boxer briefs and my goodness it felt great, for the moment. The aftermath was unpleasant, I bruised my dick and had to endure 30 minutes with sticky boxer briefs. I pretended like nothing happened and held in my pain until I got home. My mom knew I was acting weird, but she disregarded it. That cute-sexy Latina chick had no clue I fapped furiously to her. The next day, I saw her at school and smiled at her. It was kind of weird, but shit I would never forget this experience. :o:o
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Comments

  • Darth BeaverDarth Beaver Meine Ehre heißt Treue
    edited July 2010
    In your mom's iced tea.
  • BitterConflictBitterConflict Regular
    edited July 2010
    In your mom's iced tea.

    Well, yes and no. lol :o
  • duuudeduuude Regular
    edited July 2010
    lol thats weird bro.
  • edited July 2010
    I fapped in Morningside's graveyard.
  • DfgDfg Admin
    edited July 2010
    Nice story op. Man, I should really fap more :(. But I did jerk off between two mattresses one time.
  • edited July 2010
    Dfg wrote: »
    Nice story op. Man, I should really fap more :(. But I did jerk off between two mattresses one time.

    Please elaborate ....
  • BitterConflictBitterConflict Regular
    edited July 2010
    POAST MOAR EXPERIENCES/STORIES NAOO!!!11 :o

    By me posting my weird experience, makes me feel a bit odd now. :(

    Oh wellz. :D
  • BitterConflictBitterConflict Regular
    edited July 2010
    Please elaborate ....
  • edited July 2010

    Whenever I go to Pakistan I need to make sure to always lift my mattress, I don't want to hurt someone gettin their kicks. It does have the highest rate of camel fuckers per capita. Thanks for the info. :D
  • MorningsideMorningside Regular
    edited July 2010
    I fapped in Morningside's graveyard.

    You son of a bitch. Consequences will never be the same... :mad:

    As for me, when I was 13 I fapped in the back of a moving van under a blanket...
  • edited July 2010
    There was an autistic kid in my 9th grade citizenship/economics class who jerked off in class on a regular basis, wiping it on his immediate surroundings.
  • JackJack Regular
    edited July 2010
    Eh, nothing interesting really. Jerked off in my mom's car at Walmart while she was shopping. Ricky boxing in the stall at night at basic training. I don't really have urges when I'm in awkward situations anyway.
  • MayberryMayberry Regular
    edited July 2010
    I fapped in the back seat of the car while leaving IKEA.
  • edited July 2010
    You son of a bitch. Consequences will never be the same... :mad:

    As for me, when I was 13 I fapped in the back of a moving van under a blanket...

    I'm the only shitbagger to have survived such an endeavor, no?
    You son of a bitch. Consequences will never be the same... :mad:

    As for me, when I was 13 I fapped in the back of a moving van under a blanket...

    I fapped once in the bushes (half a mile or so from the school) behind my school while skipping in my senior year.
  • fanglekaifanglekai Regular
    edited July 2010
    I jacked off in a girl one time. Weird I know.
  • MorningsideMorningside Regular
    edited July 2010
    fanglekai wrote: »
    I jacked off in a girl one time. Weird I know.

    mind = blown
  • edited July 2010
    mind = blown

    Lol at elastic twat. Faglekai fisted her while jacking himself in her. Epic Win Absolute.
  • fanglekaifanglekai Regular
    edited July 2010
    Imagine how epic it was. Then multiply that by 27. That's how epic it was.
  • BitterConflictBitterConflict Regular
    edited July 2010
    fanglekai wrote: »
    Imagine how epic it was. Then multiply that by 27. That's how epic it was.

    Oh U.:confused:
    Masturbation only involves one person.
    What you said is definitely a mindblaster. Well played sir.
  • fanglekaifanglekai Regular
    edited July 2010
    Yes. Your mind has been blown.
  • BitterConflictBitterConflict Regular
    edited July 2010
    It seems that we're all were in high school or at least at an age when our hormones go batshit insane. With that being said share some weird high school experiences/stories.

    I've got another one, but this time it wasn't me. It was this weird kid in my 7th grade science class. He was an Asian nerd who would always wear thick hoody sweatshirts. He sat across the room from me. I've notice he was shaking and sweating. My table members noticed as well. We stared at him for like 5 seconds. We thought he was cold or something, but how can he because of that hoody? Well, eventually he makes a lot of noise and gets my teacher's attention. The teacher knew what he was doing and told him to clean up and embarrassed him. He gave him a lecture in class and escorted him out. After that, I never saw him ever again or at least in that class.
  • fanglekaifanglekai Regular
    edited July 2010
    Fucking fail. Wow. There was a guy in bio who wanted to go write on the board. He had a raging hardon. Everyone saw and laughed. No jacking off for him.
  • BitterConflictBitterConflict Regular
    edited July 2010
    Speaking of fail. There was this somewhat-chubby ginger girl in one of my high school classes that never used to wear underwear. She seemed kind of cute in the beginning of the year, until I found out that she wears no underwear. To be honest, she seems tappable, but she's way too fucking nasty. In that class we had to lie down and meditate before we engage in acting and rehearse roles for our plays. My teacher usually turns off the light and light some candles, as the students lie down and meditate.

    One day, she was wearing a skirt and every dude in my class sat across from her, so they can see her crotch. Almost everyone saw her twat in my classroom that day. She had a fire crotch and it looked like it was tight, but now that I think about it, that shit's her vagina was fucking vile. lol Well, as soon as my teacher turned off the lights she starts adjusting her skirt and she was taking her time at it. I heard her fondling around and whimpering. Then it seemed like she went to a sudden stopped. It seems like she was masturbating. I asked the people who lied next to her and they said she was whimpering or moaning. It was pretty weird. Later on in the school year, she contracted herpes. 'Cos it was yellowish blisters all over her mouth. I try my best to keep distance myself away from this bitch. She is so fucking disgusting. No one ever got close to her.

    I wonder how she dressed in the girls locker room?
  • fanglekaifanglekai Regular
    edited July 2010
    Fucking win. Some drama fag gave that bitch herpes. You should be ashamed it wasn't you.
  • BitterConflictBitterConflict Regular
    edited July 2010
    fanglekai wrote: »
    Fucking win. Some drama fag gave that bitch herpes. You should be ashamed it wasn't you.

    Well shit.
    1. I was a 16-year-old virgin(Still am. Well at least I got to second base a couple of times, so I'm not that mad.)
    2. I didn't kissed any girls at that time, so I don't have herpes to give her. (Either way, her uncle probably gave it to her.)
    3. She was fucking disgusting.
    4. No fat/chubby chicks aloud.
    :o:o:o:facepalm::(

    My friend told me that he masturbated in the school bathroom several times, but he had to ditch school 'cos he made a hell of a mess on his clothes. He said it was a crazy experience because the thrill he got off of it was not getting caught, by our school advisers or staff. My friend is so fucking insane that in crowded school hallways he would grab a lot of girls asses. The girls noticed, but they couldn't do shit because he was so slick about it.
  • fanglekaifanglekai Regular
    edited July 2010
    Allowed. Aside from that though, good work. I was kidding. Having herpes would suck so much. That's awesome that your friend was an overt pervert. I may have to include that in my future novel.
  • BitterConflictBitterConflict Regular
    edited July 2010
    I recall a funny experience of mine. I was watching porn at my friends house during my high school days. The bitch was so hawt that I had to run home and jack-off to her. It was very funny because my friend knew what was going on. I disregarded his thoughts for that time, and ran home very fast. The next day all my other friends knew about the incident. :o
  • BitterConflictBitterConflict Regular
    edited July 2010
    Masturbation is one hell of a drug. It makes people do the strangest things.

    SHARE MOAR STORIES/EXPERIENCES!!!!!!!!!!!11
  • fanglekaifanglekai Regular
    edited July 2010
    I used to masturbate all the time when I was a teenager. Once I hit 20 or so I was less horny and didn't need to jack off all the time. I'm 24 now and I'm way less horny most of the time. I think I realized that so little of my life is spent having sex compared to the time I'm not having sex, so I decided to invest my time in other pursuits.

    I've jacked off in the woods before. It's fun watching semen fly onto leaves.
  • jarkofjarkof Regular
    edited July 2010
    Class mate. I forget his name because we called him wack for 4 years. He rubbed one out in the computer lab. HAha noob. I would say mine but A person on here knows me and no its not at your house icee weiner. I have never and would never. Except in your butt hole.
  • RuptureRupture Regular
    edited July 2010
    In my boss' house into the wall mounted basin in the bathroom.
  • edited July 2010
    in the shower... I guess I'm not very adventurous
  • edited July 2010
    I don't tend to toss the salad anywhere other than in my own home really.

    My friend told this kid that masturbating was "rubbing your dick on a radiator" when he was younger. The next day, the kid came into school like "I stood there rubbing my dick on the radiator for an hour and nothing happened!"

    Lulz was had.
  • fanglekaifanglekai Regular
    edited July 2010
  • jarkofjarkof Regular
    edited July 2010
    Roflmfao to trx's comment on the radiator.
  • VizierVizier Regular
    edited July 2010
    Brb I'm gonna go look for a radiator
  • fanglekaifanglekai Regular
    edited July 2010
    Report back.
  • mashlehashmashlehash Regular
    edited July 2010
    I once masturbated in a log cabin bathroom when I was on vacation with my parents.

    I played pocket pool in class sometimes to this hot teacher. Never got caught.

    I masturbated in this bathroom while I was babysitting this milf's kid. I raided her panties drawer and HAD to bust a nut.
  • jarkofjarkof Regular
    edited July 2010
    Vizier wrote: »
    Brb I'm gonna go look for a radiator

    So.........
    What's the news. Is it truly helpful. Lol.
  • fanglekaifanglekai Regular
    edited July 2010
    I wanna know what happened with that radiator. Was she hot?
  • jarkofjarkof Regular
    edited July 2010
    ^
    Fucking LOL
  • Malcolm XMalcolm X Regular
    edited July 2010
    fanglekai wrote: »

    It's fun watching semen fly onto leaves.

    That changed my life.

    On topic, when I was 17 I worked at Burger King and this smoking hot Mexican girl gave me her order. Damn the image of that girl stuck in my mind, so about an hour later, when I was supposed to be washing dishes I snuck into the freezer and beat off through my BK pants.

    Have it your way:)
  • CloudcatCloudcat Regular
    edited July 2010
    During Geometry class, at the back of the room.
  • MayberryMayberry Regular
    edited July 2010
    Cloudcat wrote: »
    During Geometry class, at the back of the room.

    Math+for+Fun.jpg
  • fanglekaifanglekai Regular
    edited July 2010
    Has no one noticed that the OP misspelled WEIRD. IT says wierdest place.
  • Vox DucisVox Ducis Semo-Regulars
    edited July 2010
    I have fapped in the following places :

    - Latin class when I was 11
    - While staring at a girl's thong in a classroom at the university
    - In a movie theater, seated between my aunt and her daughter
    - In the sea (very very hard to do)
    - On a balcony, sperm falling from 5th floor.
  • MayberryMayberry Regular
    edited July 2010
    Vox Ducis wrote: »
    - On a balcony, sperm falling from 5th floor.

    Careful, if a crime gets commited there and the CSI investigate it, they'll find your jizz and place you at the crime scene.

    "We found samples of your semen at the scene of the murder. I hate necrophiliacs. Book him."
  • fanglekaifanglekai Regular
    edited July 2010
    That would be lulzy.
  • BitterConflictBitterConflict Regular
    edited July 2010
    fanglekai wrote: »
    Has no one noticed that the OP misspelled WEIRD. IT says wierdest place.

    Oh U :o
    Mayberry wrote: »
    Careful, if a crime gets commited there and the CSI investigate it, they'll find your jizz and place you at the crime scene.

    "We found samples of your semen at the scene of the murder. I hate necrophiliacs. Book him."



    Keep this thread alive.
  • MayberryMayberry Regular
    edited July 2010
    In the bathroom of my piano teacher's house after reading some music history.
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