I got no job, I got no girlfriend, I got no friends...

Totse BotTotse Bot Banned
edited July 2010 in Spurious Generalities
I'm not autistic, ugly, or fat! I'm a good conversationalist! I'm a great guy! So why am I a social outcast? It isn't fair!

I hate my life. :(

Comments

  • MantikoreMantikore Regular
    edited July 2010
    well, at least you got totse.






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  • DysgraphiaDysgraphia Locked
    edited July 2010
    Because you're too lazy to get your ass up and socialize.
  • angryonionangryonion Just some guy
    edited July 2010
    Do more comics since you have so much time on your hands.
  • wasjoshwasjosh Regular
    edited July 2010
    Blunderful wrote: »
    I got no job, I got no girlfriend, I got no friends...


    Sounds like you've got no problems.

    Congratulations, I'm the biggest asshole I've been exposed to and for some reason people keep bothering me.

    How do you keep them away? You know, like getting your phone to stop ringing...

    Sounds like a A++ submission.
  • AnonymousAnonymous Regular
    edited July 2010
    angryonion wrote: »
    Do more comics since you have so much time on your hands.

    Get to it.
  • zerozerozerozero Acolyte
    edited July 2010
    I have periods of time like this too. It's cause I'm fucking lazy and don't answer my phone or call people back. I have like 7 missed calls from before I woke up today. I'm to lazy and unmotivated to call any of them back.

    I'm probably missing out.
  • mafiabromafiabro Regular
    edited July 2010
    Lazyness gets the best of me too. I almost passed up going to a concert just so i could sit on my ass all day.
  • wasjoshwasjosh Regular
    edited July 2010
    Come on guys.

    You don't need these asshole.

    Repression and shit, ftw.
  • zerozerozerozero Acolyte
    edited July 2010
    ^^^ Maybe if you're an anti-social loser. I enjoy being around people and having people I can call friends. Repression would be limiting yourself to a pre-defined series of events, which is what usually happens when you choose to sit on your ass all day by yourself.

    Living on the internet is lame. You will only change and become a fuller/better person if you live in real life. Everything that happens on the internet is/was basically chosen to happen by us as individuals. That's not how real life works.
  • MarijuanasaurusMarijuanasaurus Regular
    edited July 2010
    Godfrey wrote: »
    I have periods of time like this too. It's cause I'm fucking lazy and don't answer my phone or call people back. I have like 7 missed calls from before I woke up today. I'm to lazy and unmotivated to call any of them back.

    I'm probably missing out.

    This is me.

    My problem is weed though. Id rather be by myself and smoke than hang out with friends most days.
  • mafiabromafiabro Regular
    edited July 2010
    Hang out with friends and smoke weed:confused:
  • Fetus-SmasherFetus-Smasher Regular
    edited July 2010
    OP needs a hobby, make little statues out of poop and light them on fire.
  • zerozerozerozero Acolyte
    edited July 2010
    This is me.

    Id rather be by myself and smoke than hang out with friends most days.

    Same here. If I didn't have my own bag right now I'd probably have called everyone back in an effort to get high.

    I prefer to smoke by myself because I don't function very well socially while baked. This creates a problem, because I always want to get high but at the same time I don't because It's not actually that fun.

    This is where pills come in.
  • MarijuanasaurusMarijuanasaurus Regular
    edited July 2010
    Godfrey wrote: »

    This is where pills come in.

    liquor for me.
  • wasjoshwasjosh Regular
    edited July 2010
    Godfrey wrote: »
    ^^^ Maybe if you're an anti-social loser. I enjoy being around people and having people I can call friends. Repression would be limiting yourself to a pre-defined series of events, which is what usually happens when you choose to sit on your ass all day by yourself.

    Living on the internet is lame. You will only change and become a fuller/better person if you live in real life. Everything that happens on the internet is/was basically chosen to happen by us as individuals. That's not how real life works.

    Friends are only people you fuck over more than they fuck you.

    If you enjoy it, Freud says your lacking somewhere else, it's just about filling holes.

    The repression thing is a Freud joke. The only thing that gets repressed, for the most part, is crazy sexual desires. It has nothing to do with wacking it all day to online porn.


    Don't shoot the internet balloon too soon, especially since I didn't mention it at all in my post.



    Anyways, back to my original point.

    Do shit you want to do, not want others want you to do. (Have friends, fuck out babies, goto places you don't feel like etc. etc.)


    Do what you want OP, and if that's staying away from people, don't repress that. (hataha, get it now?)
  • zerozerozerozero Acolyte
    edited July 2010
    ^^^ The problem with your post is that you come across as someone who has very limited friendship/relationship experience.

    "Friends are only people you fuck over more than they fuck you over"

    Really? Because as far as my actual/best friends go, we have never fucked each other over, at least not in a way that wasn't mutual and understood. I would never consider anyone who knowingly and deceivingly fucked me over as a friend.

    Sounds like you have given up on this whole life thing a little pre-maturely. It is what you make it, brah.

    "Do what you want OP, and if that's staying away from people, don't repress that. (hataha, get it now?)"

    I'm going to have to strongly disagree with this, OP. I see only doing what you want as a form of repression in itself. Life is about experiencing. Every experience that happens to us is valuable and has lessons to be taught. Only doing what you want/feel like is one of the best ways to dig yourself into a (deep) depression.

    Staying away from other people can be necessary at times in ones life because of our mental state, but it's never the best advice. Unless you are truly devoted to the idea that you would be happier living a solitary lifestyle.

    This is getting a little off topic now though.
  • GreenbullGreenbull Regular
    edited July 2010
    Start drinking seriously. Drinking = you can associate with more people.
  • zerozerozerozero Acolyte
    edited July 2010
    ^^^ I actually agree with this.

    Fuck the whole sobriety thing, man. Everyone has vices and yours may aswel at least be one that improves your social life.
  • mafiabromafiabro Regular
    edited July 2010
    Greenbull wrote: »
    Start drinking seriously. Drinking = you can associate with more people.

    This is a really good tip. How old are you blunderballs? Go to a bar if you can. If you cant, find someone who will take you to a party. Then just drink a few beers, knock down a couple shots, and play kings into the early morning.
  • edited July 2010
    yeah do the drinking thing. Its a lot easier to be social when your shit faced drunk.
  • Totse BotTotse Bot Banned
    edited July 2010
    No way. The last two times I actually went out to a party I got drunk, and made a fool of myself. :( I never heard from those people again.
  • NumberjumboNumberjumbo Regular
    edited July 2010
  • MarijuanasaurusMarijuanasaurus Regular
    edited July 2010
    Blunderful wrote: »
    No way. The last two times I actually went out to a party I got drunk, and made a fool of myself. :( I never heard from those people again.

    Thats probably the best idea. Unless you really enjoy the drink. In that case, start drinking at home, so you build up a tolerance, and you get used to it. That way you dont act a fool around other people.

    Dont ever drink while youre sad though. Worst idea ever.
  • MorningsideMorningside Regular
    edited July 2010
    I try to be as antisocial as OP, but I have friends that won't leave me alone. If I don't answer texts, they call me. If I don't answer the phone, they come to my door. If I don't answer the door they fucking throw rocks at my window and that's annoying so I let them in.
  • GreenbullGreenbull Regular
    edited July 2010
    Blunderful wrote: »
    No way. The last two times I actually went out to a party I got drunk, and made a fool of myself. :( I never heard from those people again.

    You have to gauge how drunk to get by the people around you.

    ie serious people drinking = don't get wasted.
    young people getting drunk = don't stop.

    Honestly: drinking has been the best thing in my life, and I had huge social problems.
  • SLPSLP New Arrival
    edited July 2010
    Blunderful wrote: »
    No way. The last two times I actually went out to a party I got drunk, and made a fool of myself. :( I never heard from those people again.
    You were probably around uptight NORPs who don't find humour in what you do. Not a good environment for a totsean.

    In all seriousness, I am spreading lies to everyone you know which makes them not want to talk to you any more. I am part of a massive global conspiracy to silence you because you know our secret.
  • Dog BoyDog Boy Acolyte
    edited July 2010
    Buy a pair of 67 hole boots with aircushion soles.

    Shave your head.

    A couple of lines and a thermos of Joe and you'll be kicking in heads at the punk rock show.

    Then you will meet a girl who rides a scooter, she will take you out of town.

    And all will be well.
  • edited July 2010
    Blunderful wrote: »
    No way. The last two times I actually went out to a party I got drunk, and made a fool of myself. :( I never heard from those people again.

    Well then your hopeless. I suggest becoming an hero.
  • wasjoshwasjosh Regular
    edited July 2010
    OP, we've failed you.


    The time has come for you to leave the conscious world, please donate heavily to keeping the board alive before you jump.






    Thanks,
    and good-bye.
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