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So thinking about buying an 11K Sex Doll? Read this

Stumbled on this while browsing ahem reddit but the information is quite relevant.

I’ve spent approximately $11,000 now on sex dolls and toys, namely a “BoyToy” doll (by the creators of RealDoll), a “Venus 2000” blowjob machine, as well as a “LifeDoll” Japanese doll and a “HoneyDolls” Japanese doll head. These products had looked interesting to me when viewing pics online, but let me tell you… the actual experience of owning them was easily the most awkward thing I’ve ever experienced in my life. Are you shifting uncomfortably in your seat? Excellent. Let’s proceed:

Silicone dolls with metallic skeletons such as RealDoll and BoyToy are quite heavy; the box they ship in is easily 100lbs. That person next to you? Ask them to go limp then pick them up, carry them to another room, and set them down without hurting their fingers or toes. See? It’s not easy. When the five-foot-tall plain cardboard box finally arrives, be ready to explain to your neighbors why you took the entire day off to receive a “grandfather clock” which they aren’t allowed to look at. Also be ready to have a friend help you move this alleged family heirloom if you live up stairs. Once the box inside, there’s an exhilarating naughty feeling, like successfully stealing a porno. Like cheating the system. However, for me, as soon as I opened the box, I realized: I’ve made a huge mistake.

Still, I paid so much for the damn thing. Better get it out of the box.

As you may have seen, the faces of state-of-the-art sex dolls look unnatural in an Uncanny Valley (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Uncanny_valley[1] ) sort of way. The faces look like a woman who has had an unexpected ice cube slowly sliding down the middle of her back every day randomly for a week. Newer dolls have adjustable faces — even removable faces and eyelids, eyeballs and throats. Once everything is adjusted, the sexy-female illusion can start to be seen (as in the JPEGs selling them), but preparing the doll is the hidden dealbreaker of owning a doll. If one owns a doll, I highly suggest that all the preparation not be done while horny, because it will kill all sex drive. Hmm? What’s that? Hang on, my darling, your eyeball is looking off in a weird angle. Let me just remove your entire face and fix it for you. Shudder.

Preparation typically involves moving the doll, applying some powder to the otherwise tacky silicone, putting on clothing, applying heat using an electric blanket, then finally moving it into the desired position. Again, once all of the libido-robbing preparation is complete, the illusion is at its most believable. I imagine several owners leave their doll in their beds (as the IAmA requester asked about) just to cut down on preparation time. On a web site called “DollForum,” many sex doll owners appear to be comfortable or at least adjusted to all of this preparation. For myself, it was too tedious to be worth it. I imagine that the most long-lived owners have had the fewest actual relationships, for there is little to compare against.

Still, the doll was for sex, and I paid a lot for it. I had to proceed. For science.

Sex with a silicone doll requires imagination and lots of it. Sure, the physical appearance can be quite sexy if she’s decorated with your favorite outfit and wig… but the act itself falls short. There is no intimacy. There is no sound, no movement, no interaction, no sparkling eyes pouring themselves deep into yours; closing slightly as you find a thrusting pace she loves. There’s no connection.

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