This is a guide on how to put your advert, raise awareness, spread propaganda or just piss people off by hijacking a newspaper or other free, easily accessible medium a Company gives out.
The example I will be using is Jack Wills, a Company in the UK and soon to be America, that sells over-priced clothes/condoms/bags/shit to pseudo-bourgeouise kiddies who attend Jack Wills Polo events in the Summer, or are just generally annoying, narrow-minded sheep. Americans, just think of the typical Abercrombie-wearing douchebag and the giggly “super sweet 16” mindset. got it? Good.
For this you will need
- A target.
- A laser printer.
- Opaque bag.
- A way of creating your text/image or whatever.
- Latex gloves.
- Nondescript clothes (hat, glasses [not shades though], scarf, nondescript shoes etc. just. blend. in. so research your target audience…)
What kind of message are you wanting to get out? Do you want to target a specific company? Spread awareness by piggybacking on the Company’s products or just piss off the consumers who buy from the target company. If the Company you target is a big one which you don’t agree with, then maybe Anti-Capitalist messages? Fuck, whatever suits you and the Company/Customer demographic.
Do your research. Find a place that either gives out a high volume of free products. In this file I will be talking about newspapers, but it can also be branded products which aren’t newspapers.
Once you have your motive and target, then collect some of the items. In this case the newspapers are within the store.
Collecting the products.
Wearing nondescript clothes, go and collect the medium you wish to hijack. As I said, they are kept in the stores in the case of this particular company. Wearing the clothes, do a bit of research, or if you want to go for it the first time, taking your opaque bag (either backpack or carrier bag, preferably a self-shaped one which won’t give away what you have stuffed in it) go to the products and grab as many as you feel comfortable. Walk around for as long as you can stomach and blend in. Don’t rush, and realise that all these things you are taking are free, so there’s no guilt.
Doing the work.
Head back to your place and read a few pages of the newspaper. Do some research. Get to know the company. Do they have any dirty secrets they don’t want you knowing? Or something their customers may not know? If you want to spread propaganda then target a company that is the total opposite, or maybe the customers if they may agree with your views.
You can use stickers, but for this I assume you don’t have custom ones, so open up Photoshop or another program you can use to make text/pictures and get to work. Something small but effective. 300px by 300px is a comfy size. Don’t get too cocky and print out a few different designs. Just make your own stickers, basically. Once you have designed them, apply your gloves, print them out with the design in the middle of a page and let’s get pasting.
Pick the paper up, wearing your gloves and get cutting. The reason I say to use the middle of the page is because laser printers have identifying marks which they print on the pages you have designed. More info can be found at the end of this text file.
Cut out your designs and stick them in random pages of the paper. If you want you can get clever and put them in the “advert” section of the paper, or you could just garishly stick them throughout and wherever. Just make sure they don’t poke out the sides.
Seperate the pages of the target paper and apply a thin layer of glue, very thin, and put your work on top, then another thin layer around the edge of your print-out. Seal it well so it stays.
Once you have stuck them all in, keep the papers in order but leave them hanging somewhere to dry so the pages aren’t stuck together. Leave them overnight to dry.
Taking them back.
Take the papers back in another, different set of nondescript clothes. This time, take them into the shop with no bag. Blend in quick and people won’t suspect a thing. Walk around, once again try and not puke, but after a few minutes of pretending to read them and look like a customer, place them back. If there is another pile, then place them on top. Just act casual.
You can now walk out and breathe a sigh of relief, knowing you have educated/pissed off/advertised whatever to an annoying part of the populus.
Other ways of annoying people with Company-media.
- If the Company has newspapers then you could just stick the pages together. Annoying enough.
- Put Goatse in there instead.
- If there are “help yourself” pen drives, take them back home, put whatever you want on them and replace them over a a few days at different times and wearing different clothes.
- If the company gives out free water bottles, take a few, then take more over the next few days and re-brand them with your own label. Replace them over the course of a few days. Place them in areas of high/medium level public traffic.
- Business cards? Take one, copy the design but place your own, slightly altered message on them. Replace them on the sly when you next go back. Maybe take a load, scarwl your advert on the back and replace them later. Slyly.
- Always wear gloves. Better safe than sorry.
- Nondecript clothes are what you make them. Blend in with your target Company’s audience.
- Always watch out for CCTV. Do recon first!
- Advertising on level crossing gate. When it’s sticking up then voila, flag! When it’s down, a banner.