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Little Oral Annie's Perfect Handjob
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[*]! Little Oral Annie presents ![*]
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[*]! "The Perfect Handjob" ![*]
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[*]! Call Tequila Willy's Great Subterranean Carnival: 209/526-3194 ![*]
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Ok, guys, Little Oral Annie is here to tell ya all about the way to get and
give the perfect hand job....The best thing to do is, if ya got a girl who has
never done this thing before, sit her down and have her read this. If ya don't
have a girl now, save this and when ya do have her read it then...ok.
First of all MOST girls know how to give a hand job, but there are a few
out there who don't...You can tell if they treat your rod like a piece of dead
fish..They just don't know what to do with it..Most girls either have grips
that are too limp, lacking conviction and exuberance...They tend to pull or tug
at it during inappropriate moments, they need to learn rhythm, so try and put
on some music that you like and get them to follow the rhythm for starts..<if
they don't got the rhythm you are wasting your time>
The next thing ya want to do it make sure they don't have L-O-N-G finger
nails coz these girls tend to scratch...This can cause a lot of pain and could
ruin your love life for the rest of your life.
Now for the girls who read this...Your first concern is the lay of the
land...Is it a large one or a small one? <small ones may need tweezers> or is
it somewhere in between?....Once ya got that figured out you are on your way...
<Let me tell ya something about cock size: men tend to have this obsession
with cock size...This is probably a mental vestige of his primitive primate
past, but as far as human sexuality is concerned it's a waste of time.>
Realy girls, the size of it realy don't count unless ya got this deep
seated psychological attachment to well-endowed men..<but on the other hand a
whopper beats a needle anyday of the week!!!!!!!!!!!>
Ok, now ya got the size in mind <or in hand>....What about its shape?? Is
it curved like a boomerang or straight like an arrow?................ I have
found that if it curves to the right, use your left hand....if it's curved to
the left, use your right hand....this gives maxium pull, coverage and stoking
power.
Next, does your hand fit completey around the spongy mass of the shaft, can
you hand completey engulf it?? If not, Use two hands!!! Ya see you want to
cover it completey so ya can give it a good squeeze all at once, but please
be careful...don't be an organ grinder...Be gentle but firm.
A man LOVES to have his pud worshippd, played with, tickled, fondled and
licked...so don't be afraid to do so....<you may want to make sure that they
have washed there in the last day or so..guys tend not to take baths very
often..so this is a must!>
Once ya got your hands on the problem you DON'T want to start jerking and
stroking just yet....let your fingers run from the balls up to the top of the
head, swirl around a bit and then go back down...then slowly step up the
pace...just a bit <--again don't suddenly lapse into a series of beatings,
wackings, jackings and jerkings>..You want to tease a bit more...Bring your
palm up to the top of the glans and park it there, flat out, fingers held
together and stiff....spin it around as if you were trying to desperatley to
remove the tight lid of a jar....This should make him begin to groan in
delicious agony.
You also do not want to forget the BALLS...Let your hands slip down and
GENTLY grab them, then slowly tug on them down and then up the side of there
shaft....If they are big and bulky, like grade AA eggs, bounce them up and down
a couple of times in your hands <--tell him how heavy they feel, how SEXY they
are...he will love it> BUT PLEASE DON"T SQUEEZE THEM!!!! you can realy put a
damper on love making for the rest of the day...<if ya squeeze them too
hard..maybe the rest of his life> <second thought..this is one good way to fix
an unfaithfull lover for good...use your own discretion>.
Now, let go of the balls and bring your fingers together to makeshift
goosehead formation. Very lighly, begin to stoke his erection with your
fingers, running them all over his shaft....Just keep it up and remeber DON"T
MISS THE BEAT....!!!!!
Now I will give ya a few things ya can do...This is a list I got from a
great mag...PLAYGIRL...from an artcle called, "HOW TO GIVE THE PERFECT HAND
JOB"....I can not think of any better styles than what they gave and so I shall
give them to you....
* THE FLAME:
Place your hands down on ether side, your fingers pointing away from the
cock. Pretend you're a campfire girl and start spinning his pecker like a
stick of wood. This way you'll keep the home fires burning for a long time to
cume <grin>.
* THE BASE CLUTCH:
Tighen your thumb and forefinger around the base of the shaft, pressing
down on the balls. This will cut off the blood <acting like an impromptu cock
ring> and help you steady the shaft in your hand. If the skin on it is slick
and immutable, you cna stroke the penis with more friction, thereby enhancing
the excrucating experience. <--I like fruit flavored lubbicated oil for
this....coz once ya stroke ya can toke..hahahah L.O.A>
* THE LOVE TUG:
As you are stoking him, lightly pull on the wispy strands of pubic hair
sprouting from his testicles...DON"T PULL so hard that you remove
them....<unless ya want him on the celling > But tease them gently, lovingly
pull them. This will make him holler with delight and awe at your
inventiveness.
* THE TWO TIMER:
Tickle his balls with one hand while the other jerks him up and
down....<again rythm counts!!>
* THE THIGH-SWATTER:
Use the hand that is currently unemployed to firmly but lovingly pat his
inner thighs...<whapping his rod on his thighs is good too, but don't believe
the old wives tale that it will make it grow larger....What ya see is what ya
got...thats it..>
* BEST FIST FORWARD:
Place your fist against his perineum as you're stroking him. <perineum =
the portion of the body in the pelvis occupied by urogenital passage and the
rectum, bounded in front by the public arch: the area between the rectum and
the scrotum> He'll probably start opening his legs a little wider, giving you
more space to press against. Guaranteed to drive him wild....
* So thats it girls and happy stoking to ya!
*
* Little Oral Annie**
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