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Horse Diary


All stories on this web site are purely FICTIONAL. The people depicted within these stories only exist in someone's IMAGINATION. Any resemblence between anyone depicted in these stories and any real person, living or dead, is an incredible COINCIDENCE too bizarre to be believed. If you think that you or someone you know is depicted in one of these stories it's only because you're a twisted perverted little fucker who sees conspiracies and plots where none exist. You probably suspect that your own MOTHER had sex with ALIENS and COWS and stuff. Well, she didn't. It's all in your head. Now take your tranquilizers and RELAX.


This is the second installment of Mr. New Stallion-owner's journal. I am
posting it for him via this no-name account to protect everyone's privacy.
---------------------------------------------------------

Saturday, September 1, 1990-

This afternoon I managed to spend time with Did again. He was real nice and
quiet, doing his lazy saturday afternoon droopy sleepy thing. I started to
brush him and he stood nice and still. I spent some time doing my usual
fondling and he started to get nice and hard for me. Not rock hard yet, but
real long. I think I know why he gets shitty in the evenings as of the past
few days. I don't think he is getting enough to eat. He gets BITCHY after
he's done eating. But the afternoons it's REAL easy to get all his
attention, cuz he's spending his time in doze mode.

Hell, I managed to get a nice mouthfull of horse cock today! I started to
pump and suck and he got thick, but not hard. I also started a new ploy to
getting him excited. I put my hand on his prepuce when it's extended, if he
gets drawn and shows his glans I reward him with a chunk of carrot! It
seems to work! He started getting drawn more quickly as this excersise went
on. Should be good! All I have to do is keep it up. (he he)

Sunday, September 2, 1990-

Sigh! Sho nuff! The lazy afternoon syndrome is what gets did quiet enough
to be handled wiht ease. Kinda funny. We got a pump from the river
working so that we could spray the paddock down with water to keep the dust
down. I decided to use this opportunity to start scrubbing did's sheath,
prepuce and penis down to get rid of the excess of smegma. DAMN good fun!
And I get called a "good owner" when I do so! But I am getting ahead of
myself.

Did has been used as a farm animal for 10 years. He knows about step around
g, step around hah, come around g, come around hah, back up, step up and
has even learned to trot on command when he gets used as a cart horse. So
today I wanted to see what he knows. We used a single ear bridle and a
split bit. Then we put together a surcingle of sorts to keep the reins
from flopping around his legs. He did done good! Backed up and g'd and
hah'd with out any problems whatsoever. Then Pam thought it would be a
good idea to get on his back to give him some weght and get used to doing
this with a rider.

Things went well for a while, until.... Shit! What a rodeo! He got too
close to the electric fence. I started to make him come around g to get
away from the fence but he backed up instead. In my momentary indexcretion
;-) I pulled back on the reins and said "Whoa". Wrong move batman. He was
already backing up when I started puling on the reins. He kept right on
going, listening to the reins instead of my voice. Shit, right into the
electric fence. He panicked, but not enough to take off at a run. He
stopped because I kept saying "whoa" and left the pressure off the reins.
As soon as he stopped, we got pam off his back and I started right up
again. This time I made sure he was in the center of the paddock before I
tried the "come around" and "step around" commands. This time he listened!
No problems. Good horse!

Well, we got the hose working and started spraying down the paddock. THen
the thought occured to give him a bath. He liked it! I decided to use the
opportunity to clean out his sheath and prepuce. He didn't get hard and I
wasn't about to grab his glans and hang from it to pull that sucker out.
Hell, the penile retractor muscle is sooo strong he could probably pull his
penis in when it's fully erect! So I just fingered around his sheath and
pulled out major chunks of smegma. "This stuff aint water soluble" says I!
So Pam digs up a jar of "Bag balm!" I LOVE it! That is so fucking funny I
almost die laughing! She goes off to do her chores and I take did to the
walk in shed to aply liberal doses of "Bag balm" to help break up the
smegma. Boy did I ever balm those bags! Took about 8 minutes, but a
handfull of grease and some persistance can get most stallions that are
used to having thier penis handled hard. ANd he DID get hard. Kinda fully
drawn. You know, semi erect, fully thick but not rock hard. When I read the
instructions, they said "Throughly massage the bag balm into the skin of
your cow/goat/sheep whatever". he he.... Did got pretty hard while I did
that! I went away and about ten minutes later came back. I had since wiped
off my hands. I began to scratch Did's underline, his signal to get drawn,
(Well, evetually it's to get drawn, for now it's just to drop) and he did!
I grabbed a handful of prepuce and massaged and sooner than I would have
thought he got REAL hard. His glans flared up and he started to slap his
penis against his belly. I put a hand just behind his glans and it flared
up even more and he shot out a big wad of pre-come fluid. His scrotum was
suckedup real tight. He was REALLY enjoying this! Makes me feel damn good!

It's kind of weird, I have had did for about two weeks now. I am starting
to get used to the idea that yes, I honest to god have a horse now. A
stallion, with great big balls and a nice throbbing penis to match. But
more important than that, I have these strange feelings running through my
mind now. I am starting to feel, well, more stable. I am begining to
look forward to my daily visits with more enthusiasm. I am starting to get
complacent about my employment. (Hell! I used to wander from job to job
every few months or at least every year to year and a half!) Now I am more
interested in staying put in one place so that I can seriously start
thinking about buying my land and barn. I need a place to keep did that is
more private than where I am now. sigh.....

Well, I left Did alone for about 15 minutes and did other things, like
shovel out horse shit. DAMN! He shits alot! TONS! I dont fucking know where
he gets the raw materials to make all that shit with! 1.5 whellbarrow fulls
a day! I don't give him that much hay and grain all day! (Okay okay, so
maybe I do, plus some. But JEEzus. what quantities of shit! The hay must be
pretty compact I guess. I dunno. Maybe he has a built in "turd fllufer" or
something....) Well, when I got done with that, I went back to his shed, he
was nice and quiet and standing still. I started scratching his underline
again, he dropped again (of course;-), and this time I got the ole tongue
working. He actually got hard and humping! YOWZA! And so fucking soon. But
then again, he HAS been exposed to this kind of treatment in the past.
I'll have to give it some time before it gets to be like it has been.

Oh yes! I picked out his feet again and used the hose to scrub them out.
He lets me pick them up, but he has been starting to put his weight on me
when I have his feet in hand. He did that once and I let go, then he tried
it again and I just stepped out to the side and pulled his foot WAY up! The
silly shit damn near fell over! "That's right did, fall over! See if I even
TRY and help you out! I just might jump on yer fucking neck and hold you
down while I scrub out yer feet you stooooopid horse!" He didn't try
anything dumb like that again, today at least. ;-)

MOnday, Sept 3, 1990-

Labor day! Spent a good 3 hours with the Did monster today. Nothing
amazing. Just a few grabs and licks and such not.

Tuesday, Sept 4, 1990-

Well, I got there and Did was-a-waiting! RIght up by the fence. Today was
a bit chilly for this time of year. It was about 75f. According to Pam,
did had been running around in his paddock all day long. He was feeling
good. REAL good! I took him into the walk in shed and started my usual
brushing routine. Hell, he kept looking outside with his ears all pricked
up and kept swaying back and forth. "Oh my gawwwd! He's weaving! That's
supposed to be a bad habbit! Holy shit! What do I do now?" I decided to try
smacking him a few times when he did that, but he just looked so intensely
pissed off, no, that's not right, not pissed. Upset. Like, "Hey! I didn't
do nothing bad! Leave me alone". I decided to just let it pass. Maybe a
bad move, but I don't know yet, I don't know Did well enough to know wha
mood he's in. At any rate, he was doing pretty good day.
I gave him his hay and then his grain. A while later I noticed that he had
his monster 19 erection going full tilt against his belly while he ate his
hay. I pointed him out to pam and told her "hey! Did really likes the hay!"
She looked over and laughed. She told me about some kids that came over to
see the big horse. They walked up to the fence and as soon as they noticed
that he had the monster erection from hell they turned around and walked
away while mumbling something like "sure is a big horse." Pam said that she
interjected "Well, he's big *NOW*." What a riot. Can't wait till the
picnic, I am curious to see what kind of reactions did gets out of the
folks who'll be there.

I feel good every time I go to see did. It's a strange thing. I don't even
....yeah I do, I'm watching the news as I type this and I just saw the
Avery family portriat. The folks that were sacrificially murdered by the
lundgrens. It's that lil thing of trust, or at least knowing just about
where you stand with something. I know where I stand with Did. I kow he's a
stallion and I know that if he thinks he can, he'll try to dominate me. If
he thinks *I'm* a stallion, then, if he thinks he can, He'll go so far as
to try and kill me. But I KNOW that. The Avery's didn't know that. The
avery's trusted the folks they prayed with. (NOT that I am religious).
Their reward was to get murdered, one at a time by some stupid fucking two
legged peice of trash. People just seem to work so fucking hard at being
dishonest. It's truly amazing some of the things that people will do to try
and screw you over. It's just truly amazing.

It's funny how many of my freinds have gotten married and then divorced in
just a few short years. Pam even said that she wouldn't do it again. I
watch my sister and brother in law go some pretty sever amounts of shit.
All because they wanna be married. I wanna be married, but not to someone
human. I don't wanna get taken for everything I own. Hell, people work too
hard at hurting you when they wanna hurt you. It just aint worth it. Don't
get me wrong, I have met some VERY nice people in my life, Hell. I've loved
some very nice people, very much, and I still do. But I don't want to
relegate decisions and responsibility to others. And the worst of it, I
don't want to share my love of animals with those that can use it against
me and hurt me with it. It's all too strange upstairs. At any rate, I
commited myself to love only animals over 3 years ago. Till then I was
trying to push it all in the background. I was trying to hide from myself
that I might realy only be intersted in animals. Didn't work (thank god!).
Now that I own did, I am real happy that I made the decision that I did.
And it just keeps getting better.

Mr. K talked with Mr. Mouse today and talked Mouse into distributing the
journal. Pretty funny. "Are you sure?" "Are you sure you're sure?" "Okay,
I'm gonna post it. You wanna change you're mind?" "Okay! It's out there!"
No wait! I didn't mean it! Take it back! he he...

Let's see, what else. Vet will be by on thursday to get a catheter into
Did to see if he can find any bacteria. The farrier will be stopping by on
the 15'th to trim did's excessively long toenails back. Did should be
pretty well behaved as far as the feet thing goes.

Wednesday September 5, 1990-

CRIBBING! ARGH!!!! That IDIOT horse! Just aint no two ifs about it, when
it's dnear dinner time, that horse is intractable. Fact, pure and simple.
Kinda funny though. he cribbed once, and I yelled no. He cribbed again and
I yelled no louder. He cribbed a thrid time and I hauled off and kicked him
square in the gut. PANIC! PANIC PANIC PANIC. He threw his head up and I had
my hand on the lead line. The chain tightened around his chin and he looked
at me like "HOW the FUCK does that funny looking two legged horse keep me
from moving my head like that?" I told him to whoa and the Panic started to
subside (a little, enough to listen to me). So he whoad and the pressure
let up on the lead a bit. Then I pulled on the halter and told him to step
up, he did and the pressure disappeared. I gotta admit, Did THINKS I am
stronger than he is. For a smart horse he can be exasperatingly stupid. And
this cribbing thing. Hell, I don't know WHAT to do. I have no idea
whatsoever. I gotta do some reading on this particular subject.

I did a bit of the gropy feely stuff, but whenever it's before eating time,
that is just out, plain and simple. That means I have to meet with him
during the early afternoon, or late evening. And late evening is out until
I get my own place. Sigh.... ANd afternoons are only possible during the
weekends, and THIS weekend is a huge picnic at Marc and Pam's. Sigh..... In
the meantime, I just have to figure out this cribbing stuff. Well, a fe
observations are in order. He only does it when he is tied up. He has full
view of teh entire paddock and its suroudnings when he is tied. So far, I
have only noticed this behavior during the evenings before mealtime when I
have him tied while I brush him. He must be bored while I groom him. (!)
Worse come to worse and I get the biggest fucking cribbing strap I can get
and keep him in it all the time. But I hate to have to resort to such a
thing. I'd rather fix the cause of the problem than simply stop the
symptom.

Thursday September 6,1990

Well, a couple things happened today. First, I got to see did in the
afternoon because I had to meet Dr. S. He palpated did's testicles
and considered them kinda soft. Meaning that there is not much in the way
of sperm being produced. Temperature was normal, respiration and
heartbeat was normal. So, it was time to try and get a urine sample to
culture back at the lab. This meant DIURETICS! Did would need an
intravenous injection. So, I figured I would just slip the chain of the
lead over his gums. Hmmmmmm, an interesting training note comes from this
one simple action.....

When I put the chain over Did's gums, he KNOWS something that requires
force or stern countermeasures is about to take place. He might not know
what, but he knows it is going to happen. He raised holy stinking hell
about that one little injection. I had moved the chain from his gums to
under his chin, but by then, it was too late, he knew something was up. We
finally managed to get the injection into him, but in the future, I will
WAIT till Did gives me a hard time instead of aniticipationg such a thing
and taking measures prior to the hard time being given. If I take the
measures before it's time, He'll know and give me a hard time, hell. FOr
all I know, Did might have just simply stood there. But instead, *MY*
actions caused him to go into Panicicus-extremus mode.

After the Diuretic was administered, Dr. S went to another nearby
farm to palpate a mare for pregnancy. He gave me a little tube and said
"fill it". Leaving me to the task of making sure Did's urine went into the
tube. Well, it took about 5 minutes, he dropped, then became drawn but not
erect and "assumed the position". I grabbed his penis and got that sample
and avoidedthe urge to aim the jet of urine at the flowers and the dog that
was staring at me and the chickens nearby and ... well, you gt the idea.

Dr. S gives his testicles very little chance of ever working again,
but we are simply going to take things one step at a time. I wont geld him
since his testicles do *ONE* thing real well still. Produce Testosterone! I
should know the results of the test in about 1 week.

Everyone left and I was left alone with did. Hell! That diuretic is
amazing. His kidneys must have been going at about 9000 Rpm! He urinated
and urinated and urinated like mad! I got him alone in his box stall. He
followed me in! ANd stood still while I handled his penis for a while. He
was drawn but not erect due to the fact that he had to urinate again. I
sucked on his penis for a while and tried to get him hard, but it just
wasn't happening. After a bit I stopped and just watched him. He assumed
the position and started to urinate. I grabbed his penis, hell, HOSE, and
started to water things that were nearby. Like the fence posts, the wall of
his walk in shelter and the ground. Mr. K LOVES a mare's urine! It is just sooo
much a major aspect of a mare's sexuality, the urinating and winking that
goes with it, but in a stallion, it is just a teritorial symbolism. He
uses it to mark dung and Mare's urine and other things. But at that moment,
I damn near wanted to do nothing more than just take a mouthfull of urine.
It wasn't anywhere near as strong as urine straight from the pipes would
be, it was heavily watered down due to the diuretic's action of
hyperactivating the kidneys. But I didn't want to try that just then.
I saw him again that night, I didn't spend any time with him other than to
feed him. The paddock was a major mud bath due to the rains that fell
today. Plus, it was too close to feeding time for me to get any time with
him alone. Got another pam's mom story though! Pam's mother stopped by the
farm today. Apparently did was walking around, well, being an aroused
stallion. ANd let me tell yah, when did gets a hard on, it looks like it's
five hundred feet long. It's only 19 to 20 inches long when fully -belly
slapping erect- (hah! "only" he sez...) but it *LOOKS* huge! Especially if
you're one of those kind of guys who looks down while standing at the
urinal. At any rate, Pam's mom sez to Pam "My! He's such a *BIG* horse!
He's such a...... *VULGAR* horse!" Oh yeah. I damn near died laughing when
Pam told me that! I've been starting to call him "Did, the vulgar". Kinda
sounds like one of those Viking names. Did the vulgar. Did the terrible.
Nah, Did the Vulgar rings so much truer. ;-)

I guess the training lesson of the day is to *NOT* anticipate bad behavior
and take measures to control it before it ever happens. Instead, wait until
the bad behavior happens and THEN do something about it. Bad behavior in
this case means thigs like Nipping, or Cribbing or
Totally-radical-bitchin-panicy-behavior dude.

Hell, it's only the 6'th and I'm already up to 293 lines. Sigh......

Friday September 7,1990-

Took the port-a-potty to Marc and Pams for the party tommorow. Should b
interesting. Did's walk in shelter is under about 5 miles of water. So I
can't have any fun and games in there today. Damnit. And I can't stay until
dark either. Damnit.

Saturday September 8,1990-

Hells bells and donkey smells. WHAT a party. Lots of ignorant fools. Doing
stupid shit left and right. Pam absolutely REFUSES to ever host such a
thing for Marc's co-workers again. They wouldn't comport their rugrats at
all. I had to threaten one child in order to keep him away from my horse.
"You try and feed my horse a handfull of sugar cubes again and I'll reach
down your fucking throat and pull your stomach out of your mouth. You
understand me?" He kinda looked up and got this ashen look to his face and
slinked away. Now, I don't mind people doing stupid things. I expect it of
people. But I get damn near physically violent when I have to repeat myself
5 fucking times to the same goddamn moron in a space of 10 minutes. It's
like they don't beleive that I don't want sugar fed to my horse. Sigh.
Idiots....

GOOD NEWS! Did was accosted by about 7 children with handfulls of grass. He
was so intensely nice to them that I just could not beleive it. He just
went from hand to hand and face to face. He ate the grass out of the hands
and snuffled about 5 of the faces that were presented to him. He let the
kids handle his muzzle wihtout a single complaint or twitching of his ear.
The were straight up all the time. Not once did they flop over or tilt
back. DAMN nice horse. One lady even comented to me "My! He's so gentle and
laid back, for a stud." Well gee gawrsh, golly. Uh, Yeah. Of course, there
were those who kept saying "My! She's such a nice animal!" Yeah right.
Those two round things down their are tits and that big long thing that
sticks out of her stomach is a feeding tube to colts and fillies that don't
feel like standing up. Guess they're lucky to have children. I wonder how
they managed it. I suppose that I really shouldn't be so harsh though. SOme
people honestly do not know how to sex the animal. They have absolutely no
concept of how to tell the genders apart. Oh well, their loss.

He kept getting fully erect during the party. In one case, some guys walked
by and pointed and started to giggle. I mean, actually giggle. One looks a
me and looks at the horse and says "can you imagine having a pecker that
big?" "Oh sure I can" sez I without so much as cracking a smile "every time
it gets hard I just have to pass out from blood loss." Try and say *THAT*
with a straight face to a total stranger! ;-)

I was also hit up upon by a nice enough girl. Drunk as hell she was too!
But I felt REALLY uncomfortable. It's hard to pin down the uncomfortable
feeling I was having. It was kind of like I was afraid of getting involved
with someone. Like I didn't want to have to try and think up ways of
telling her I wasn't interested in seeing her. And when she mentioned that
she was married, hell, it was amazing. ALl of a sudden I wasn't at all
nervous to talk with her. Suddenly there was no more risk. No fear of
hurting or getting hurt or having to try and think up ways of seeing Did
without including her so that I can get under his belly. SIgh.... It's
weird, it really is. Not that I am uncomfortable with the person that I am,
or with my sexuality, it just honest to god is really strange to me that I
choose and like animals over people when there is just sooooo much stimuli
in my life that should have pushed me in the direction of people. I really
should jot down some of my childhood experiences some day. Maybe when I
have some spare time. (Seeing as it's 1:30 am right now....)

Sunday, September 9,1990-

Well well well well well well well well well well well well. I got to see
Did for a few hours during the afternoon. Then I had to take the portapotty
back to the contrsuction site. Then I went out and bought em a brand
spanking new VCR! Now I can make some dupes of some rather special tapes
that I have. (The NATURE specials that I always tape. I have been wanting
to do some selective ... ahem... editing of them. put together a nice
little anthology! THis should be fun!

Monday, September 10, 1990-

I got in to see Did tonight. It was dark, he had been fed at 6. I saw him
at 8:30. Pam and I talked for about 5 minutes and then she went in for
dinner. That left me alone with DID! YEAH! I walked into his pasture and
slipped a lead on him. The walk in is still under water. DAMNIT! SO I
walked to the most shadowed part of the padock and tethered him to the
fence. He was standing reall quietly. I started to rub his underline and
he started to drop. I mean like RIGHT NOW! Good horsie! I rubbed his
shoulders and neck and face and chest. he remained dropped, but not drawn.
I rubbed his underline again and he stepped away. Okay. I can deal with
rejection. But then he stepped back towards me again and I started to rub
his underline again. He stayed put and dropped again. I squated down and
looked up at his crotch in the shadows. He was just about ready to become
drawn. Did was standing with his ears forward and his neck dropped a bit.
So I put my fingers around his shaft. he still stood there. He didn't move
around at all! SO I put my lips over the end of his prepuce and then I
started to suck. He started to draw! Oh my my my my!My lips were wrapped
around the very end of the prepuce and as he started to draw, the prepuce
snapped back (inside of my mouth) and his glans burst forth upon my tongue.
I suddenly had a very huge amount of penis in my mouth. I made swallowing
motions iwht my mouth and tongue. Did got even more drawn. Not hard, but
VERY VERY full and thick! I grabbed a doble handfull of shft and began to
move my hands over his penis while continuing with the sucking and
swallowing motions. I pushed my head forward, against his penis and he
started to get hard. THen I thought I heard some noises and got up to
investigate. When I got back to did, he didn't. DAMNIT! I messed with him a
bit more, but he started to refuse my advances by side stepping and
throwing his head at me like he wanted to bite me. SO I decided that that
was enough for this evening. I led him to the gate and then let him go.

I left for the evening. But one day, that stud is gonna come in my mouth. I
can just feel it. Every time I get together with him, he gets just that
little bit more excited to be naked with me. Like tonight, he got drawn
real quickly with little effort on my part. If I had not been interrupted
by noises I am sure that Did would have gotten very hard and even humpy
with me. Mabye tommorrow night. I'll be talking with Pam and Marc to see if
it's okay if I show up later than I have been on the weekdays. I'll use
work and programing at home as an excuse.

Tuesday, September 11, 1990-

Sigh..... What a day, what a day. The vet came by and took a blood sample
to aid him in determining where the excess actinobactors came from. Oh
yeah, I don't think I mentioned this yet. We have discovered that there is
an excess of bacteria called actinobactors. It is one of several strains of
actinobactors, we don't konw which one. One of the strains has been known
to cause epidydimitis in swine. Such a thing in Did would most certainly
cause sterility. So we MIGHT have a reason for his having gone sterile.
Now, actinobactor can be considered fauna, like e.coli in the human gut.
But in huge quantities it is considered pathogenic, which is the case with
Did. Soooooooo, $500 in sulfa based antibiotics should clear him up. SHIT!
3 weeks, twice a day, 3/4 of a tube of paste based sulfa's. Man oh man oh
man. LOTS of money is about to get tied up in this horse, but, if some kind
of miracle should occur and if he should again become fecund (thank you for
that k00l word Mr. K!) At any rate, the blood sample will help Dr. S
decide whther or not the bacteria is in the kidneys. If not, then it means
that they may have concentrated in the reproductive tract. If *THAT'S* the
case, then this will be the first step in clearing him up. So it might
just be possible to get his peckersnot capable of doing what nature
intended it to do in the first place. Get mare's pregnant. ANd if *THAT*
happens, then I am going to have one major, big time, fornicating stallion
this spring! Let's see what happens!

Now then, I spent a good deal of time cleaning did's penis today! Boy!
WHAT fun! (I use enough exclamation points to be a writer for one of those
nasty "my mother got raped by alieans" tabloids.) Pam held did and talked
to him while I reached up with a palm full of vaseline and liberally
applied it to the tip of his prepuce which was poking out of his sheath.
Within 2 minutes I had 19 inches of throbbing, rock hard horse cock in my
hand. ANd I was being told what a good horse owner I am while doing it!
GOD! I LOVE IT! ANyways, it took a good 10 minutes to get out MAJOR
quantities of smegma out of his sheath. Did was fully erect during the
whole process. I finally told pam that I would simply put a huge handfull
of vaseline on his prepuce and penis and come back tomorrow to get out what
the vaseline had loosened up.

After that was done, I took Did out for a "walk". I led him out to the hay
field and let him munch away. After we crested a small hill, I tethered
him to a fence post and tried to do some groping. He sidestepped my
efforts, so I tried again. This time he decided to try and cow-kick me! I
nailed that guy on his underline right up by his chest. Hard. He didn't
look to pleased with that. I then started to walk him up by the side of
the hay field. Every 20 feet or so I would stop him with a "whoa". Then I
would walk towards his rear-end and rub my hands down over his anus and
between his buttocks over his stiffle and then under his belly and onto his
balls and sheath. If he didn't side step I'd let him munch hay, if he did
I just started walking him again. Didn't take him long at all to figure
out what I was doing. He started to stand real nice and still when I
touched him. Makes it easy to handle him by myself too. Especially if I
try and remain consistent with my reward system.

So, what did he learn? I hope that he learned that he is not allowed to
kick at me when I touch his privates.

What did I learn? I learned that if there is food involved, I should
respect his desire to not be touched. No mater how bad I wanna suck him
off.

Made a video tape with some of my favorite Music and some of my favorite
"nature scenes" videos that I have. It came out .... okay. Not great, but
sure as hell no where near as bad as many that I have seen. A little Enya
and Egberto Gismonti never hurt anyone. Especially while there are elephant
seals, Californicatia Sea Lions and Elephants fornicating their little
nubins off.

Wednesday, September 12, 1990-

Didn't get to spend a whole lot of time with DId today. But I *DID* get to
continue my "clean did out" cleaning. Pam had to hold him again while I
reached into his sheath and pulled and wiped out a major quanitity of
smegma again. The vaseline treatment seems to do a pretty good job of
breaking that stuff up. I left another handfull of vaseleeny on his weenie
and told pam that I would stop by on friday. WHich means that I wont have
an entry for Thursday. I have too much other stuff to do that has been
suffereing due to my attentions that I have been giving my horse. I have a
program to write and I have to get to bed EARLY for once! SHit, nost of
these entries are typed in at 1 in the morning and I have to be in the shop
by 8 every morning. I don't get enough sleep and work has been suffering
because of it.

THursday, September 13, 1990-

Didn't see did today, but I did get to talk to Mr. K again. I spent a while
on the phone with him. Our talks run the gamut of topics, but of course,
we always center on horses and horse lovers at some point. It's a weird
feeling I get when I talk with him. It's kinda hard to put a finger on it,
but I think it's a feeling of belonging that I get. That is a pretty nice
feeling. It's also a bit of a feeling of constant amazement that there
would indeed be another person like myself that is into horses. (or vice
versa ;-) I am pretty sure that the amazement has left me, but I still
think of all the happenstance situations in my life that caused our life
journeys to cross. *IF* I had not "found" that account at State U and *IF*
I had not been unemployed at the time and *IF* I had not been "grep horse *"
in /user/spool/news/alt/sex, then I would never have noticed his article
rebuffing someone's note about a girl having to have her stomach pumped.
THis, of course, caused me to write in response to such a knowledgable
response in regards to quantities of horse semen that a stud can produce in
one ejaculation. If none of that had transpired, I would *STILL* be
traveling my present path, but I would not know, for fact, that there are
others like myself who are into animals. I am really glad that we found
each other. It makes me feel tons better about myself.

Of course, there are plenty of folks out there who look at this and will
say "Man! You're sick. How can you not like a woman over a horse?" Well,
that's a pretty good question actually. After all, all of society pushes
me in the direction of loving women. And of course, my family pushes very
hard for me to do so. So, in the past, I have loved women and made love to
women. Most were not a good match, but one was. A very good match, but in
the end, it didn't work out. I *KNEW* that I would continue to be attracted
to animals and I *KNEW* that I would get my stallion some day and I *KNEW*
that I would make love to that horse and I *KNEW* that she would sue me for
divorce over such an episode if she caught me and take away everything that
I have worked so hard for. It's paranoia on my part, but it is a self
serving paranoia that I do not wish to get rid of. But the question
remains, why do I love stallions so much? Hmmmmm. I feel an essay coming
on.

WHY I LOVE STALLIONS
by Me!

Stallions are powerfull animals, big, beautiful and inteligent in their own
special ways. They smell...... so strong. They act...... so self assured.
And they are formidable lovers. What could possibly induce a human to
become sexually attracted to a stallion?

There are many varied reasons. Lots of little points and a whole lifetime of
psychological pushes that put me in the state that I am in today. The
three big reasons are as follows.

1) I have a very strong case of Penis envy. This is a bit strange since I
am a man with the age old average penis size of 6 inches fully erect. NOt a
single woman I have ever gone to bed with has complained that my penis was
too small. Not one. Yet, I want so badly to have a huge penis, like the one
that Did has. Mind you, I'd probably pass out due to blood presuure drop if
I had an erection with such a huge penis, but that's okay. I'd still want
one. And I look at stallions and note that they have vascular penises. A
penis that flops out and slowly becomes engorged with blood. ie, their
penis is very much like a humans penis in regards to how it takes a while
to become erect. When they start to get excited, you KNOW that they are
getting excited. You can watch the progress of their state of excitement
and you can quanitatively measure that state of excitement by how long and
hard their penis becomes. And the best part is that the stallion enjoys it
when a human helps them acheive that state of excitement.

2)I like knowing that the creature that is so huge and powerful can be
excited and sexually satisfied by a creature such as myself. It is the
single greatest pleasure that I derive from Did. Knowing that I can make
him feel good. This is the same pleasure I got from making lvoe to women,
the fact that I would just go on for hours until I was sure that my partner
had acheived an orgasm. (If getting your pelvis crushed by her legs
counts, then I guess I would give her several orgasms a night, but I was
never sure, so I kept going until I could go no longer.)

3) The stallion is a simple lover and an intensely erotic one with his
single mindedness with which he mates with the mares. The stallion is also
a selfish lover. He takes the mare while she is in a state of desperate
need. A state in which she will not refuse his advances. The stallion
takes advantage of this state and mounts the mare and fornicates so
vigorously that he sometimes damages the mare. For some reason, I find
this ... intensity.... very very very erotic. The way that the stallion
thrusts with the totally single minded goal of acheiving orgasm and to hell
with anyone else strikes me as the epitomy strength. I like strong things.

It's kind of hard to define love and lust in such a way that everyone likes
the definition and in such a way that the definition aplies to everyone.
But for me, love and lust are tightly wound together when I see a stallion
trotting through a field. A stallion *IS* lust. A stallion *IS* love.
There is just no other way to put it. They are one and the same.

Friday, September 14, 1990-

Well, got out of work eraly today. We finished up tearing down a small
outbuilding and moving about 15 billion left over cinder blocks. That was
kinda interesting. At any rate, the VERY first place that I headed out to
was (of course) to see did. I got there at around 2:30. He was in wander
around the paddock mode. I looked into the box stall and noticed that it
still had ten inches of the nastiest smelliest gloppiest mud that I have
ever been allowed to play in. I got a whellbarrow and a shovel and I
shoveled the fuking thing out. I'm TIRED of waiting for nature to dry the
damn thing up. And it's good I didn't wait either. The base is clay with 7
years of mud and horse shit on top of it. SO I shoveled it out and brought
in new dirt to fill it back up. I tamped it all down and 30 minutes after I
started, I had a walk in shed for bestial fornication! Of course, I led did
in there and we had a little "talk". He's a fine and beautiful creature.

I grabbed the vaseline and the kleenex. To "clean him up some more" of
course;-) And so I started on a little fondling. About an hour later I
realized that I wasn't going to get very far and told Pam that he simply
wasn't cooperating for the venture. A side note. When I have him tied up
with his head out the window where he can see what is going on, he cribs.
He did this several times. I said stop it each time and then he did it in
rapid succesion. I kicked him in the gut and yelled "NO". He stopped.
After a while he did it once again. I kicked him in the gut and yelled
"no". He stopped. A longer interval later he cribbed again. I kicked him
in the gut and yelled "no". During this whole time, I was brushing him
with my brush waiting for him to drop. (Of course, there was the
occasional reach under his belly to help things along a bit.;-) He didn't
wanna cooperate. NO problem. I left him tied up to the corner facing away
from the window so that he could not see what was going on and I went and
got him a bale of hay. I put it in the shed right under his nose and he
went at it. Not 2 minutes later, he dropped.

I took a handfull of vaseline and rubbed my palms together to warm it up. I
then grabbed his penis and began to rub the length of his penis with
vaseline. At first he didn't like the feeling of it, it's a bit cool to
start, and then he decided that it felt allright. I got underneath him and
put my mouth over his glans and started to stroke his penis from the head
to the base in long firm strokes. He was not erect yett, so his entire
shaft kinda moved around like a big snake. But he soon got firmer and
harder and longer and before I knew it he was fully erect with my mouth
working on his glans the whole time. I used firm, even strokes over the
entire length of his shaft. He stayed erect while I did this, but as soon
as I stopped he began to loose his erection. THe entire time that I was
doing this, he was busy eating his hay. Then a thunderstorm rolled in and
I decided to untie him since he started to get the "wild eyed" look in his
face that indicated a bit of apprehension about storms.

I had a wonderfull time with did doing something a bit new. I have put
myself right in front of him on several occasions and wrapped my arms
around his neck. Today, I put myself agains his chest and he put his head
over my left shoulder. He kind of sighed and put a lot of weight on me. I
reached up and grabbed his neck and began to stroke his crest and mane. I
rubbed his cheeks and nose and his throat and neck. He sighed. It was
reall nice feeling. I grabbed his crest with both hands and pressed my
hips into chest, feeling his muscles under the surface of his skin. He
feels so strong and powerful. I like to imagine that I am a mare about to
be taken by his hugeness. I look up into his eyes while imagining this and
I start to rub against his chest with my pelvis. It takes less then 2
minutes for me to come while doing this! DAMN! All the times I have spent
with Heidi, I NEVER came that fast. Not once. It always took an hour or
more, and the strangest thing about it was, that to make it last longer, I
simply thought about fucking women. But when I finally wanted to come, i
imagined that I was a stallion and this was my mare and within 10 strokes,
I'd acheive orgasm.

Tommorrow is the farrier. THis should be interesting.

Saturday, September 15, 1990-

Did stood so weel for Mr. Farrier the farrier that it was just amazing.
Even Mr. Farrier was commenting on how well he stood for the trimming. Now
Did's feet look just fine! A few more trims and his feet should be looking
real well. As it is, they look much much better than they did just a few
short hours ago. I also stopped by the veterinarian's today. I *FINALLY*
finished the friggin sort routine for him. I am so embarrased that it took
so long. Oh well, maybe next time I'll draw it up like I always have in the
past and it'll go much better than. That way I don't loose so much time
with our battering. I picked up 32 tubes of Tribessin for the
"Acetinectobaceter" which is, as Dr. S claims, the proper spelling of
the bug in Did's bladder.

The blod test for his kidney function came back. Everything is working just
fine! This means that if the bacteria is cleared up, he might, maybe, just
maybe start producing sperm again. Now *THAT* would be a bonus of owning
this wonderful animal. It's a bit strange, but I have noticed that hardly
anyone wons stallions around where Did is being kept. I think, if I manage
to get a place, that I might just go into business breeding mares. I'd own
nothing but stallions (and of course, at least *ONE* mare ;-) and just get
involved in provided mare owners with the service of "instant sperm!".
Should turn a few heads in the community I'm Sure.

And today, a mircale of man and nature occured. My appartment got hit by a
white tornado. Pam (for a proper fee of course) stopped by my appartment
and helped me clean the downstairs portion of the appartment. It is
amazing. It took about 10 hours to do, but it is imaculate now. It is so
nice that I'm thinking of not living there anymore so that it doesn't get
messed up. "Well sir, is your apartemnt still clean?" "Don't know Pam, I
haven't been there in 3 months."

Well, when it was all done and over with I knew a whole lot more about Pam
and Pam knows a whole lot more about me. It's funny, but if she were to do
it over again, she would not get married, and if I were to start to get
married, she's to shoot me so that I don't make that mistake. It's funny.
(In it's own way I guess.) But when I got pam back home that evening, I
tried my fun with Did, he side stepped three times, so I decided to leave
him alone. More later.

--------------------------------------------------------------
Cribbing: chewing on the wood in the stall. Often includes wind-sucking,
where the horse hooks his teeth over some ledge, pulls back hard
stretching out his head and neck, and gulps air.

Crest: the top of a horse's neck, where the mane grows from.

Farrier: fancy name for a horseshoer.
 
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