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Lust
All stories on this web site are purely FICTIONAL. The people depicted within these stories only exist in someone's IMAGINATION. Any resemblence between anyone depicted in these stories and any real person, living or dead, is an incredible COINCIDENCE too bizarre to be believed. If you think that you or someone you know is depicted in one of these stories it's only because you're a twisted perverted little fucker who sees conspiracies and plots where none exist. You probably suspect that your own MOTHER had sex with ALIENS and COWS and stuff. Well, she didn't. It's all in your head. Now take your tranquilizers and RELAX.
Subject: ARCHIVE: lust.Z
"Maybe you'r mad because I just said what you didnt want to
admit- that all you feel is lust." That was what Ariel said as she
walked in the illustration class I shared with her. I talked to
her consistently in various deep conversations in the past 2 months
or so. And a few times I confronted her.
Ariel was a slim, attractive, junior, with long, blonde-brown
straight natural hair. Her face was dotted with freckles, and her
eyes mystically danced as she talked to me. Her dress was a vague
cross between post modern and something out of a classical
painting. She was a raver without the artificialness. She was
completely natural.
Was I infatuated? Lust? Love? Lust was was she was getting
to. The day before I came near her, and talked, talked about how
I was, in many ways, dying inside. Almost a telepath, she got to
the point that I wanted to be with her. "An excuse", she smiled,
"but at least you had one.".
An excuse. To talk to her. Talk coerce her into bed. So she
picked up. She walked off. I wasnt as much as anything with the
remark, as I was confused.
The nest day, mentioned this to her, except replacing the
words "pissed off" with confused. And so the comment "Maybe you're
mad because I just said what you didnt want to admit- that all you
feel is lust."
I could not say I did not lust for her, because an entire side
of her was almost an aphrodesiac when she got to it. An openess,
a mysticalness about it all, which made near impossible not to
think of sex even when she wasnt talking about it. But that wasnt
the entire story. The spock-like tendecies of not saying what was
irrelevant, like emotions, had caught me in a trap.
I shrugged and sat down to complete my art project. At a
certain point, I was out of inspiration, waiting for some
interesting thought to enter my mind. I stared off, into blank
space. My mind wandered.
Ariel sat 3 feet besides me on the work tables. My head
casually wandered to stare in her direction.
Lust.
I did lust for her. I lusted for her mind. I did not love
her. Thats what she was talking about. Wanting to leech off her
mind and fuck her body until I was satisfied. But what was the
concept of love then? Wasnt enjoying someone for their mind love?
I blinked and other random thoughts entered my mind as I broke
my line of sight, when I realized I was staring at Ariel, and she,
right back at me.
"I knew it." She grinned.
"Huh?" I said in a partial daze.
"I knew you couldnt look someone in the eye for any long
period of time."
"What? I wasnt even aware of---"
"No, never mind." She laughed and rested her head down on the
table.
I blinked.
It was an invitation. Or maybe a test. A taunting almost
that she was right and I was wrong.
Then something snapped.
Fuck this. Im tired of being the loser always on the bottom.
Im tired of these fucking games. I want a straight fucking answer,
will you be with me, or will I have to play these games, until I
win, or your satisfied? Fine, Ill your game.
I got down from my stool and walked to her. I rested my head
down, at the same angle, and inches away from her face.
I gazed into her green eyes. Blankly for the first few
seconds.
More thoughts.
Her eyes shuffled, only slightly as if trying to keep steady.
Cant you understand?
Damn you why cant you see? Why cant you understand?
Her face was straight, and sober, in massive contradiction to
the previous grin.
So what if I lust after you? Is that so bad? So what if I
want to be with you, be with your thoughts?
30 seconds.
I mean, after all, isnt that what it all comes down to? The
ultimate common denominator? We're all animals, at heart, and no
matter how philosphical, how romantic you get, thats what we all
want, something to hold on to. The beauty that I never had. That
beauty which I have been deprived from all my life because Im so
ugly.
45 seconds.
Physically ugly? I wasnt sure. I never had a "girlfriend" in
my entire life, much less have lost my virginity. They were all
afraid. Afraid of my mind. Afraid of my thoughts that never went
with their trendy preppie statements. I am ugly and different, and
for that I am taunted for. But you, you are beautiful and
different, but for that you are feared.
Can't you see? We're the exact same. Its just these shells
that seperate us.
1 minute. The art class kept on its callous way, with no one
noticing or caring.
The voices in my head were louder and louder, until I
whispered in my own state of agony.
"I wish you were ugly. That way I could be your friend. But
you are beautiful, so I want to fuck you."
"So you admit it." She casually whispered back, with no major
change on the expression of her face.
My heart beat, as my reality started to stretch.
"That I want to fuck you? Yes. Who wouldnt? But thats not
it. I lust for you, but I also want you, want you as a friend. I
cant suppress my sexual feelings around you, but I want to be with
you, mentally, and emotionally, far more than I want to fuck you."
"Another excuse."
"Why? There are plenty of other beautiful girls around at
this school. Why would I want to be with you, in particular?
Because you have something to offer me far greater than sex, and I
have something to give you in return. You are truly different.
You dont just dress that way, you are. Cant you see that?"
I dont know you. All I know that you are different, original,
and have far more thought than most people in this world. I cant
say I love you. I can only say that I want to be with you, I want
to be your friend. Why couldnt even she see that, dammit?
"Do you really mean that?" She asked.
"What do you think?"
"I ... I dont know. I knew it, I suppose, its just how youve
been acting, weird sometimes. I cant tell. I mean, its just I
didnt want to take that chance... I ... I--"
She had been raped. Abused by some earlier boyfriends. A
glimpse of her pain that she once uncovered to me. A pain so
similar to mine. Raped and tortured and taken advantage of, not
physically, but mentally, by family members, school administrators,
and even friends. But hers was a pain that I could only imagine.
A pain that I had no right to comment on.
"Im sorry." I said.
"Its allright. You took a chance. Theres no harm in that."
The bell rung. Damn, why did it have to ring now? All of
this would be lost, in the social complexities.
"Follow me." She calmly stated.
She lead me out into the deserted hallway of the art building,
where student traffic was rare.
She stopped, turned around and hugged me, long hair flowing.
I squeezed tightly as something warm washed over me. A deep feeling
starting at my heart and flowing throughout my body, something I
had only felt in my fantasies. Combined with that was the
intellectual high of all, brightening the world. My loins began to
stiffen, as for the first time, I was hugged by someone who wanted
me in the same way I wanted them.
She felt it against her thin cotton pants, my heart leaped.
"Im sor-- I didnt mean--"
She kissed my, open mouth, before I could go any further. It
was passionate, like in the movies. I wrapped my hands around her
neck, and then face as I felt her tongue and tasted her sweet
saliva combined with the chili dog she had for lunch. Her face,
her body was soft. There was no hair, or callousness. In such
contrast to my face, and my hands. My lips, dried and cracked
stood out against her soft continous mouth.
My penis became fully erect.
She reached her hands up and felt it through my shorts. I
slowly broke away from the kiss.
"I want to be your friend. Please, its only a thing on the
side."
"I want to be your friend AND I want to fuck you." She
smiled, with her eyes dancing, as if reassuring me.
She pulled my shorts down, enough to fully reveal my erect
cock. The bell rang, again, assuring that no students would be
around in the halls. Her class was independent study art class,
where the teacher wouldnt care. My next class was off campus, at
a magnet school for which the bus wouldnt come for another 30
minutes.
"Now? Here?"
She giggled, with mystical moves, kneeling down, the vulerable
humanness, only adding to the attractiveness of the contrary
goddess-like characteristics.
She kissed my penis. I gasped in the touch of electric
pleasure.
I stroked her luxurious hair.
"Would it be a crime to say 'I love you'?" I said.
"I love you." she responded, as she prepared to take my cock
into her mouth.
It was releif, touching pain, looking it in the eye and
instead of moving on, conquering it.
Gushes of precum came to the head of my stiff rod.
She engulfed me with her mouth. Her warm and moist oral
enclaves better than anything I physically felt in my life.
Her tongue lolled around my dick as I took one hand and
started to rub my balls, expanding the pleasure twofold.
Her lips moved up and down with her tongue feeling all of my
cock. Up and down, in a warm environment. Even in my fantasies,
I could never conceive being this high, emotionally or physically.
"I love you too. More than you would ever know." I said,
passionately.
She took her mouth off me, after agonizing seconds, blew a jet
of cool air on my penis.
I exploded into orgasm, with jets of cum streaming on her
face, over and over, the first flood of white splattering on her
forehead and luciously dripping down.
She got up and licked the cum, and kissed me again and smeared
the cum on my face. I reached inside her pants, and slowly
shuffled down her panties.
"Me? Here? Wont that be a little hard?"
I dropped her baggie pants to just below knee level. Her
panties joining them instantly afterwards. She spread her legs,
stretching her clothes, giving me a full view of her beautiful,
blonde pubic hair. A mystic vulva.
I started to drop to my knees. On my way, I felt her clothed
breasts, soft and nipples erect. They were perfect. She was
perfect. I would have to see all of her sometime later.
I saw creamy vaginal cum slowly going down her legs. Its
smell made my cock hard again. I lifted up my head and gently
spread her clit with my fingers.
I licked her moist, fluid covered bead. My tongue circled
around the inside of this meaty slit of the woman that I loved.
"Oh, yes, Oh yes." She screamed, as in a porn movie.
My tongue played games, going in and out, circling, in and
out, circling.
"Yes, Ooooahhh... Yes, give it to me, give it to me... FUCK
ME..."
She patted my head and scratched my ears, like a dog, and
then, slowly lead her hands down to my face, slowly feeling it.
Touching as if it were some holy idol.
It was now, when I realized, it wasnt that I just loved her.
She loved me. She viewed me as a friend, a sex god, a perfection,
in the same way I viewed her.
Her vagina started to quiver as I could tell she was starting
to orgasm. I received a massive jet of her load on my mouth,
tasting like her. Truly her.
I loved her. I wanted to be her. I was her.
She pulled me up, as we embraced, like, lovers, friends,
family, seperated for so long of a time.
I knew her. I knew what she feared, what she meant. I knew
love.
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