Quotes from Twin Peaks

Cooper: I'm sure the Sheriff will be able to recommend a clean place, reasonably priced -- that's what I need, a clean place, reasonably priced.

Leo: Leo needs a new pair of shoes!

Ben: Leland's daughter was murdered and the Norwegians left.
Jerry: I'm depressed.

Waiter: (roughly) Your milk is gonna get cool...
Cooper: (lying on his back, bleeding) OhKaayy

Cooper: Look! Ducks! On a lake! Ahhh.

Sarah Palmer: I miss her so much. I miss her so much! I miss her so much!!!

Cooper: Albert's path is a strange and difficult one.

Albert: Agent Cooper, I am thrilled to pieces that the Dharma came to Hohoho, I really am.

Jerry: We had those vikings by the HORNS!

Cooper: Two eggs over hard. I know that's hard on the arteries, but old habits die hard--just about as hard as I want those eggs.

Lucy: All men in the world should be taken to a desert island and forced to eat sand!

Truman: You saw a giant?
Cooper: Yes.
Albert: Any relation to the dwarf?

Pete: This smoke inhalation is a nasty business. I feel like someone taped my lips to the tailpipe of a bus!

Jerry: Marshmallows?!! Ben, WHERE ARE THOSE HICKORY STICKS?

Pete: Now let me get this straight... your _entire_ _country_ is _above_ the _timberline_?

Jonathan: Next time, blood brother, I take your head off.

Truman: You know, I should take up medicine.
Cooper: Oh? Why's that?
Truman: Because I'm beginning to feel a bit like... Dr. Watson.

Judge Sternwood: So, Agent Cooper, how are you finding our little corner of the world?
Cooper: It's heaven, sir.
Judge S.: Well, this week heaven includes arson, multiple homicide, and an attempt on the life of a Federal agent.
Cooper: Heaven is a large and interesting place, sir!

Catherine: I can't understand a word you're saying... you have a thing in your mouth!

Log Lady: My husband was a logging man... he met the devil.

Catherine: Everything here smells like fish.
Pete: Well, you could try washing your socks separately.

Cooper: Did you know Laura Palmer?
Leo: No.
Cooper: How well did you know her?
Leo: I said I didn't!
Cooper: <smiles> You're lying.

Catherine: Are you an ambitious man, Mr. Ness?
Mr. Ness: One likes to think so.
Catherine: One never knows. There may still be a few T's left to cross.

Cooper: So, how long have you and Hank been friends?

Log Lady: Fire is the devil, hiding like a coward in the smoke.

Log Lady: You wear shiny objects on your chest. Are you proud?
Major Briggs: Achievement is its own reward. Pride only gets in the way.

Nadine: Ed! You waiting for those drapes to hang themselves?

Cooper: I think I saw a rabbit!
Truman: Snowshoe rabbit.
Cooper: Snowshoe! Snowshoe rabbit!

Albert: I like to consider myself one of the happy generations.

Andy: They shot Waldo!

Log Lady(?): Sometimes owls are big.

Cooper: So how long have you been seeing this... Dick?

Deputy Hawk: One woman can make you fly like an eagle. Another can give you the strength of a lion. But only one in a cycle of lives can fill you with gladness and the wisdom that you have known a singular joy.

Cooper: Wanna know why I'm whittling?
Truman: OK, I'll bite. Why are you whittling?
Cooper: Because that's what you do in a town where a yellow light still means slow down, not speed up.

Cooper: Harry, I really have to urinate!

Log Lady: I do not introduce the log!

Jerry: Look at what she gave me: a whole leg of lamb! You sprinkle some garlic on that, some fresh mint, that's rotisserie heaven!

Cooper: Sheriff, what kind of fantastic trees have you got around here? Big, majestic--
Truman: Douglas firs.
Cooper: Douglas firs....

Jerry: Here we have two ledgers and a smoked cheese pig... so which one are we gonna burn?

Cooper: Diane, I'm holding in my hand a small box of chocolate bunnies.

Leland: Dance with me! Please, someone, dance with me!!

Sarah Palmer: Don't ruin this too!

Lucy: Sheriff, it's Pete Martell up at the mill. I'm gonna transfer you to the phone on the table in the hall. The little table, with the lamp on it--the lamp that we moved from the corner? The BLACK phone, not the brown phone.

Cooper: They got a cherry pie there that'll kill ya!

Albert: You listen to _me_! While I will admit to a certain cynicism, the fact is I am a nay-sayer and a hatchet man in the fight against violence! I pride myself in taking a punch and I'll gladly take another because I choose to live my life in the company of Gandhi and King! My concerns are _global_. I reject absolutely revenge, aggression, and retaliation. The foundation of such a method... is love. I love you, Sheriff Truman.

What Cooper says to Bobby in the questioning, but mainly because of the look on his face when he says: "Here's how this works. I ask the questions and you answer them! Briefly! And to the point!"

Cooper: Man! Smell those trees. Smell those Douglas firs.

Sarah Palmer: Laura, honey, are you upstairs?

Secretary at the Great Northern: The Norwegians are leaving! The _Norwegians_ are _leaving_!

Pete: There was a fish... in... the percolator!

Truman: Think they spotted us?
Cooper: Gimme a donut.

Albert (in reference to Sheriff Truman): Look, it's trying to think.

Secretary at the Great Northern: Audrey, look what you've done! Audrey.... Audrey, don't go in there--Audrey!

Cooper: Diane, I've just entered the town of Twin Peaks. Twelve miles south of the Canadian border, eight miles west of the state line. I've never seen so many trees in my life! As W. C. Fields would say, I'd rather be here than Philadelphia.

Jacoby: Bobby--did you CRY?!?

Jerry: It's a baguette... with brie, and butter... I had six of these damn things every day I was over there!

Sven: Ben, I am so happy, I can't even tell you how much.

Lucy: Agent Cooper, I've got a call for you from a Mr. Albert Rosenfeld, sounds like long distance. It has that open air sound, you know, where it sounds like wind blowing... like wind blowing through trees...

Albert: I've got compassion running out of my nose, pal--I'm the sultan of sentiment!

Cooper: Sheriff, we got a lot to talk about.

Jerry: I'm in love... her name is Heppa... she's a giant snow queen with a smile like a sunrise on an ice floe--you could go blind just _looking_ at this girl!

Cooper: There's a large group of insane men staying on my floor.

Mrs. Tremond: I ordered no creamed corn. Do you see any creamed corn?

Ben: Now let's get in there and get those cheese-eaters where they live.

Albert: Mr. Horne, I recognize that your position in this community necessitates venality, insincerity, and a certain irritating manner of expressing yourself. Superiority, however, is not a necessarily inherent trait. Therefore, please listen closely -- You can have a funeral any old time. You dig a hole, you plant a coffin. I, however, cannot perform these tests next year, next month, next week or even tomorrow -- I must perform them now. <drill noise -- VEEP VEEP!> I've got a lot of cutting and pasting to do, gentlemen, so please return to your porch rockers and resume whittling! (Puts drill to Laura's forehead and starts drilling...)

Log Lady: Shut your eyes and you'll burst into flames.
Truman: Thanks, Margaret.

Cooper: Twenty-four hour room service must be one of the premier achievements of modern civilization.

James: Would you like to play with fire, little boy? Would you like to play with Bob? Would you like to play with _Bob_?

Pie-Eating Man: Hot DAMN, that's good pie!

Albert: Sounds like you've been snacking on some of the local mushrooms.

Pierre Tremond: J'ai une ame solitaire. --> I have a solitary soul.

The Giant: The things I tell you will not be wrong.

Cooper: Harry, I'm gonna let you in on a little secret. Every day, once a day, give yourself a present. It doesn't have to be fancy--it could be a new shirt at the men's store, a catnap in your office chair, or two cups of good, hot, black coffee.

Little Man from Another Place: Let's rock!

Leland: Sing hallelujah, c'mon, get happy--c'mon and chase all your blues away!

Albert: Has anyone seen Bob on earth in the past few weeks?

Leland: He would say, "Would you like to play with fire, little boy?" <flicks burning match at Cooper, Cooper picks it up and looks at it>
Cooper: That's our man. <Poof!>

One-Armed Man: In the darkness of future past, the magician longs to see. One chance outs between two worlds... fire, walk with me.

The Giant: The owls are not what they seem.

Cooper: This must be where pies go when they die.

Truman: You must have the metabolism of a bumblebee!

Bob: Catch you, with my death bag!

Truman: Anything we should be working on?
Albert: Yeah, try not dragging your knuckles on the ground when you walk!

Jerry: Next stop: Rocket Science!!!!

Albert: I know, Andy, I know. It's what we call a three-hanky crime.

Pete: She's dead... wrapped in plastic!

Cooper: DAMN good coffee, and HOT!

Albert: Oh yeah? Well, I've had about enough of morons and halfwits, dolts, dunces, dullards and dumbbells--and you <ignorant?> yokel, you blithering hayseed, you--you've had enough of me?

Cooper: Short stack of griddle cakes, maple syrup slightly heated, melted butter, slice of ham... nothing beats the taste sensation when maple syrup <CLAP> collides with ham.

Log Lady: Come then! My log does not judge!

Cooper: And as we all know from experiments conducted during the Korean War, Diane, sleep deprivation is a one-way ticket to temporary psychosis.

Leland: Mares eat oats, and does eat oats, and little lambs eat ivy... a kid'll eat ivy too, wouldn't you?

Cooper: So Harry, how long you been seeing her?
Truman: (awestruck) How did you know?
Cooper: Body language.
Truman: Geez louise!

Cooper: Harry, my dream is a code waiting to be broken. Break the code, solve the crime.
Lucy: (taking notes) Break the... code, solve the... crime.

Bobby: Bills? Forget about bills. I'm talking about a new way of life.

Bob: You may think I've gone insane... but I promise, I will kill again!