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The Hacker's Warehouse #4
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? "Millions of Phun things 2 do at Skool" ?
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? Date: 10/14/94 Written By: ???Sandman??? Issue No. 4 ?
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What's up? It's me again (your probably wondering to yourself "What the
F*ck is this guy still doing around all New publications HAVE to fall apart
after the first 2 issues are out!!!") Well not me I' have a steady supply
of ideas that will keep the issues coming out at least until NEW YEAR'S!
So far I think I've been doing a good job on these issues but I could sure
as hell use some help writing these things. Totured Soul has offered me my
own message and file area (What A |<-R?d D00d!) I took him up on the offer
and when I get up to 10 or so issues THP PIT will acquire these new items!
I guess I should cut all this B.S. and get to the article. So....
THW Publications proudly present..."Phun at Skool!"
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This is gonna' be sooo coollll......... Most of us go to that terrible
place so adults can throw useless information at us in great quantities
that they expect us to memorize. And they do this for a full 9 months!!
Now most of us just sit there and take it all... I say F*ck THAT! Get up
off of your butts and do somthing.. have a little phun. Adults put kids in
school to keep us off the streets and out of trouble.. But no one ever said
we can't have fun and cause trouble in school! That's where this text file
comes in handy. This will give you some ideas on how to have more phun in
school. Part 1, being this file, deals with non-destructive and mildly mean
Every school you will ever go to has at least one completely
annoying loser that you would just love to harass. Compiled here
is a collection of dirty tricks to play on just such people.
Things to do with an eraser...
1. Hide it in the 'Class Idiot's desk.
2. Super Glue it to the teachers desk.
3. Put tape on the side that erases... the teacher will try SO
F*cking hard to erase the board, he/she will go nuts!
4. Tape a Snap-Pop to the erasing side. When the teacher trys to
erase the board... *POW!* Scares the shit out of them!
5. Put animal guts all over it!
6. Put rubber cemment on the side you hold it on... when the teacher
grabs the eraser.. Haha
Things to do with Super Glue... (If you get strong glue this stuff
works like a charm!) Remeber: Super Glue dries in 15 Seconds FLAT!
1. Glue the light switches up... This is great!
You will definatly need a hammer to turn the lights off
2. Glue the chalk to the board!
3. Glue the door handle up... The door will be locked for
awhile! Trust me!
4. Glue books to the teachers desk!
5. Glue Pens to the wall.
6. Glue Chairs to the floor. (Wooden floors only)
7. Pour glue on the 'Dork's chair!
8. Pour glue all over the Door Handle.. Super Glue is impossible
to take off w/o Alcohol.
9. If you have the type of teacher that buys coffee at 7-11 or
AM-PM, then the cup will be made from Styro-Foam... Glue the
base of the cup to the desk. When tries to pick up the cup, it
will rip the cup in half, and he will get Coffee EVERYWHERE!
10. If you have nerds in your class that have 'Pencil Cases'
Then glue the cases shut! Haha
Things to do with ROAD KILL & and Animal Crap...
1. Tie the road kill by its feet and hang it from the ceiling!
2. Put the road kill in the teachers desk (Rats/Squirls are best)
3. Chop up the road kill and put it in someones bag!
4. Chop it up and put it in someones desk! Phew.. THE SMELL!
5. Gut it, and take the guts and throw it against the black board
and walls!
6. Chop the head off and place it on the teachers desk.
7. Replace the Chalk with a rat arm!
8. Get a bag of Dog Shit and put it in someones Lunch.
9. Get some dead Rat Heads and put then in someones Lunch.
10. Get a bag of Dog Shit, and pour it in someones bag.
11. Get some Dog Shit and put like a dingle berrry in someones
Milk, Soda, Sandwich, Pasta...etc... Hopefull they will atleast
get it into their mouth! Eww!
12. Just place some Dog Shit or Cat Shit and hide it somewhere
like in the corner... the smell will get SO bad, and since they
can't find it... Well, you know... Haha
13. Take a bloody chicken foot, and place it on a desk, and with
some blood, write "666 SATAN LIVES"!
14. Smear Shit in someones Math Text Book... I hate math.
15. Buy some cheap meat, and soak all the blood from it, and
splash it all over the chalk board.. and make sur to get
some meat chunks on it also. And write "NATAS WAS HERE"!
16. Find a dead Dog and chop him up and spread his guts all over
your class! Haha
Other things to do...
1. Throw ball bearing on the floors! Haha
2. Throw crushed ice on the floor by the door way...
everyone will become instant iceskaters! Haha
3. Stick Bombs are *Always* a lot of phun...
4. Put Garden Slugs in the drinking foutain..
5. Blow up a desk w/ a remote detonator... while class is in
session!
6. Take some books from one person and replace them with
someone elses.
7. Did you know flinging sliced beets upward will often cause
them to adhere to the cafeteria ceiling? Tomatoes too!
8. Start to giggle moronically in class.
9. Get everyone to start humming and NEVER stop, the teacher
go NUTS! And what is he/she gonna do? Punish you all?!?
10. Make GIANT spit wads, and as the teacher is writing on
the board... Throw them at the board! Key: >DO NOT LAUGH<
11. Throw staples at someone! It hurts like hell if it hits the
face!
12. Toss staples into someones hair!! It'll stay there for
quite some time, i assure you.
13. Write Satanic verses in your text book for the next person
to use it!
14. See who can throw spit wads at the ceiling longer without
getting caught.
15. Take something from someones desk and throw it in the garbage..
watch their reaction... *DO IT TO A WIMPY NERD*
16. Write a note to a girl saying she has food stuck between her
teeth. Watch what she does, she will go nuts trying to get it
out... Just keep telling her it's still there!
17. Tell an Egotistic girl she has Cellulite on her leg (during
class)..
If you have a Phys Ed/Gym class, go to someones locker and
break open one of those el cheapo ball point pens, making sure that
you don't get any ink on yerself. Now, carefully apply the thick,
dark ink to the numbers on the dudes locker dial. Don't forget to
smear a good portion on the actuall knob also. When he gets back
it'll be next to impossible to dial the right combination since he
can't even see the numbers!
If you sit right in back of someone you really hate, heres a
nice little trick that can result in loads of pain to the victim.
Take a nice rubberband, preferably the thin ones, and start
twisting it for about 75 or so twists or until little knots start
to form in the rubberband (if you do a "double helix" kind of twist
the trick won't work). Now, stretch the twisted rubberband taught
and place it on the dudes hair and let go! Instant hair tangler.
In computer class it's always fun to set up the unoccupied
computers to start beeping hyterically at a certain time. Write
a (Basic) program something like this:
10 FOR x = 1 TO 50000
20 NEXT x
30 FOR y = 1 TO 10
40 PRINT chr$(7)
50 FOR w = 1 to 100
60 NEXT w
70 NEXT y
80 END
Do this to a few of the machines and run them simultaneously. In
a few minutes the machines will be beeping like mad and drive the
teacher up the wall. It's really fun doing it to a substitute
teacher who doesn't know shit about computers and has to turn off
the power supply, thus ruining *everybody's* programs!
Another great computer trick to play if yer schools 'puters don't
have any disk drives or any form of backup, is to disable the break
keys (or sequence thereof) and wait til some dork types in a long
program with an infinite loop and runs it! heheh
If your schools library has an electronic theft protection
machine, there's bound to be little metallic strips buried deep in
the pages of most of the books. Try to find those little strips
by opening a book and spreading the pages apart (this takes some
time and patience). Put the little strips in some idiot's backpack
along with a few bullets. When he walks through the electronic
gate watch out! He'll most likely have to empty out his backpack,
and when they find those bullets on him...heheh, expulsion city for
the dork (at least in the LAUSD it is).
Ya know how some people like to slide down those rails in the
center of stairways? The obvious thing to do here is to cut loose
with a big glob of spit, heavy on the mucus, right on the rail!
If not that, take one of those "paint" pens and draw a thick line
right down the rail. When the idiot goes to slide down it...well,
you know the rest. An ever better this to do it, super glue a small
nail upward on the railing...*OUCH*!!
If you really are sick of a class, just take some gum and
stick it in the locks to the doors of that class. Guaranteed to
prevent the entree of the teacher or anyone else until the janitor
can remove it! Also ToothPicks Work just the same, if not better.
If you have typing or computer class, it's always fun to sit
in the back and pick yer nose and leave the residue on the
keyboard. Same goes for doorknobs, locker dials, light switches
hand rails, etc...
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Well thats it for issue #4 of The Hacker's Wearhouse I hope U enjoyed it.
In the upcomming issues besides what I mentioned look for a:
-The Hacker's Wearhouse SUPER SPECIAL 4 New Years.
-HUGE pyro collection of the best and new
stuph created by Yours Truly!!!
But until then Have tuns of Phun and don't get caught!!
Have a Shitty Day,
???Sandman???
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