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A statue of Dukakis
THE COMMONWEALTH OF MASSACHUSETTS
TO: ALL MASSACHUSETTS STATE TAXPAYERS
FROM: MEMBERS OF THE DUKAKIS STATUE COMMITTEE
RE: FIVE (5) MILLION DOLLARS
We have the distinguished honor of being on the committee to raise five
(5) million dollars to place a statue of Michael S. Dukakis in the Hall
of Fame, Washington, D.C.
This committee was in a quandry as to where to place the statue of THE
DUKE. It was not wise to place it beside the statue of George
Washington, who never told a lie, nor beside Franklin Delano Roosevelt,
who never told the truth, since THE DUKE could never tell the
difference.
We finally decided to place it beside Christopher Columbus, the greatest
Democrat of them all. He left not knowing wherer he was going, and upon
arrival did not not know where he was. He returned not knowing where he
had been, and did it all on borrowed money.
Over five thousand years ago, Moses said to the children of Israel,
"Pick up your shovels, mount your asses and camels, and I will lead you
to the promised land." Nearly five thousand years later, Roosevelt said
"Lay down your shovels, sit on your asses, light up a Camel, this is the
promised land."
Now Michael Dukakis has stolen your shovels, kicked your asses, raised
the price of your Camels, and mortgaged the promiswed land. If you are
one of the fortunate Massachusetts state taxpayers who has any money
left over after paying taxes, we will expect a generous donation as a
farewell gift for our former governor and this statue project.
Fraternally yours,
James Shannon, Chairman
THe DUKE Statue Committee
P.S. It is rumored that Mike is considering another bid for the
Presidency with Ted Kennedy as his running mate. Thye are considering
changing the Democratic party symbol from a jackass to a condom, because
it stands for inflation, protects a bunch of pricks, halts production,
and gives one a false sense of security while being screwed.
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