Killing squirrels — Totseans

Killing squirrels

ShadyTrollShadyTroll Regular
edited August 2011 in Life
Best way to kill squirrels? Am thinking some kind of poison would be best but I would prefer for them not to die in my yard. Maybe there's something that won't kill them immediately. Can't shoot them since it's a residential neighborhood. Don't care to trap it & release them, fuck being humane. These fucking squirrels are a nuisance. :angry:

Comments

  • DoctaDocta Semo-Regulars
    edited August 2011
    The juice/syrup from a from a can of fruit with plaster of paris mixed in, put the dish in the fork of a tree.
  • edited August 2011
    Docta wrote: »
    The juice/syrup from a from a can of fruit with plaster of paris mixed in, put the dish in the fork of a tree.

    How does that work?
  • DoctaDocta Semo-Regulars
    edited August 2011
    Intestinal blockage.
  • RemadERemadE Global Moderator
    edited August 2011
    I prefer to camp out with a silenced rifle and pop them in the head. Place something of interest on the tree (food, mostly) and wait. Patiently.
  • BurnBurn Regular
    edited August 2011
    Slingshot?

    Rat poison?

    Try giving them a go on the plate if you manage to get one with the slingshot. I've heard they taste like stringy chicken.
  • Darth BeaverDarth Beaver Meine Ehre heißt Treue
    edited August 2011
    12 year olds should not play with squirrels.
  • edited August 2011
    Air rifle, silencer attached. Leave your food out, wait for them to come along and plug them in the skull, one by one. Don't do it in the UK though, they're endangered here :D
  • RemadERemadE Global Moderator
    edited August 2011
    trx100 wrote: »
    Air rifle, silencer attached. Leave your food out, wait for them to come along and plug them in the skull, one by one. Don't do it in the UK though, they're endangered here :D

    Are you fucking kidding me? I shot 2 in the head while they were mating. I think it's only red squirrels that are endangered. I call them tree rats for a reason.
  • edited August 2011
    I'm not sure actually. I know that the red squirrels are definitely endangered, I probably got that a little wrong. So anyway, if you're in the UK, you should shoot as many squirrels as you can.
  • dr rockerdr rocker Regular
    edited August 2011
    trx100 wrote: »
    I'm not sure actually. I know that the red squirrels are definitely endangered, I probably got that a little wrong. So anyway, if you're in the UK, you should shoot as many squirrels as you can.

    It is red squirrels that are endangered and protected in the UK. I am far enough North so I do see the odd red - I dont think anyone on here is further North than I so every squirrel you see should be a grey. People often confuse greys for reds, but unless it looks red/ red brown, its a grey. Under the Wildlife and Countryside Act 1981, messing with reds will see you prosecuted. Greys however, are fully treated as vermin. You can spring trap them, poison them but you wuold have to take steps to ensure non target speices were not poisoned or you can shoot them.

    Use a +10ft/lb air rifle with flat head / round head pellets. Their is more kinetic energy transder with those than with pointy pellets, which could just zip through the quarry like a needle.

    Anyone who only goes for headshots is a moron. Sure, head shot it and it will die, but you are much more likely to miss than with a chest shot that will kill it equally as well. Missing is not such a problem for the quarry animal, its what is behind it that matters!

    They do make good eating - I find that any finger food you would make for chicken goes well for squirrel. Dont mess around trying to get the meat from the bones tho as you will end up disapointed - cook on the bone and eat from it.

    Edit: I dont fuck around with a silencer either - my air rifle is an underleaver - by the time I had reloaded, any others would have fucked off. If I was using a PCP I might consider using one as you can squeeze one shot off after another.
  • ThirdRockFromTheSunThirdRockFromTheSun <b style="color:blue;">Third<em style="color:pink;">Cock</em>FromThe<em style="color:brown;">Bum</em
    edited August 2011
    I was in this vacation camp once, and I saw a squirrel thats head had been run over. There was a weird shade of yellow surrounding it, but the rest of it's body was perfectly intact. It was awesome.

    So, maybe you could run over your squirrels?
  • ThirdRockFromTheSunThirdRockFromTheSun <b style="color:blue;">Third<em style="color:pink;">Cock</em>FromThe<em style="color:brown;">Bum</em
    edited August 2011
    I was in this vacation camp once, and I saw a squirrel thats head had been run over. There was a weird shade of yellow surrounding it, but the rest of it's body was perfectly intact. It was awesome.

    So, maybe you could run over your squirrels?
  • ShadyTrollShadyTroll Regular
    edited August 2011
    12 year olds should not play with squirrels.

    I know but they are eating all the bark off my trees. The trees are now dying & if they can't be saved it's going to cost me A LOT of money to have the trees removed. There's 2 really big trees they are now feasting on after they ate all the bark off the others.

    Is there a specific poison I can set out that the squirrels will eat? (brand name & store it can be purchased at, preferred). Would the squirrels be dumb enough to eat poison out of a dish? I can't exactly climb up in the trees & bait it. It would look weird & attract attention from the neighbors. This is a suburban neighborhood.

    I can't sit around with an air rifle. It's probably illegal to shoot the squirrels even with that. I don't want my neighbors reporting me. I just need these fucking squirrels to die. :angry:
  • ShadyTrollShadyTroll Regular
    edited August 2011
    My husband JUST told me he thinks squirrels like peanut butter so I should spread peanut butter on bread & mix rat poison in then leave it out. I wonder if that would work, I might try that. With my luck all the fucking birds would eat it then I'd have a bunch of dead birds in my yard. :facepalm: I hate birds, too- they eat the grass seed when I seed my yard. :angry:
  • RemadERemadE Global Moderator
    edited August 2011
    dr rocker wrote: »
    Anyone who only goes for headshots is a moron. Sure, head shot it and it will die, but you are much more likely to miss than with a chest shot that will kill it equally as well. Missing is not such a problem for the quarry animal, its what is behind it that matters!
    Edit: I dont fuck around with a silencer either - my air rifle is an underleaver - by the time I had reloaded, any others would have fucked off. If I was using a PCP I might consider using one as you can squeeze one shot off after another.

    Theoben Rapid 7 FTW
  • dr rockerdr rocker Regular
    edited August 2011
    RemadE wrote: »
    Theoben Rapid 7 FTW

    Decent air rifles, but even second hand they go for £500 - I would only be spending that money if I was after a FAC air rifle. Heard a couple of people say the mag for the rapid 7 can be flimsy as shit and they are not cheap to replace. However, the point still remains, you are more likely to miss a head shot than a body shot.
  • GoingNowhereGoingNowhere Global Moderator
    edited August 2011
    Well here is a website for squirrel traps: http://www.squirreltrap.co.uk/ The thing is though, because it seems your yard is a natural habitat for squirrels, they will keep coming and coming.
  • dr rockerdr rocker Regular
    edited August 2011
    On thinking about it I would just get some pets. A cat would probably catch and kill a few but a small terrier about the place would mean the squirrels just would not come in.
  • ShadyTrollShadyTroll Regular
    edited August 2011
    This is why I hate squirrels. :angry:

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    An arborist came out & told me there's a fungus on the trees & it attracts squirrels. So, today I bought a fungus treatment at a local garden shop.

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  • MaxstatsMaxstats Regular
    edited August 2011
    Got to Home Depot and buy a Have-A-Heart trap. Squirrels love peanut butter and cat food so inside the trap put either of those mixed with rat poison. The squirrel will get trapped and eat all the food in the trap and then by the next day he'll be dead. Drop his body into a trash bag and repeat with the trap until you stop catching squirrels. Worked for me. I killed 8 squirrels in my yard this way and now I don't have a problem with them anymore.
  • dr rockerdr rocker Regular
    edited August 2011
    Those branches look like they are pretty much ring barked - so does the trunk in one of them, meaning the tree would usually die. Cut it down, or cut it back to the stump and let new branches grow. That style of tree is called a pollard - they used to cut them off a bit higher tho - 8-12 foot off the ground, so grazing animals could not reach low branches and eat them and the leaves.

    Because the tree you have bushes out so low, its like a squirrel main road - it is so easy for them to climb as they have so many climbing branches. I would then remove anything from the garden that could hold the fungus, give the place a couple of months and buy in a new tree from good stock. Even if you kill the fungus in your tree, its still pretty much fucked as it is weak and susceptible.
  • Darth BeaverDarth Beaver Meine Ehre heißt Treue
    edited August 2011
    ITT OP thinks squirrels do things they don't :facepalm:
  • ShadyTrollShadyTroll Regular
    edited August 2011
    dr rocker wrote: »
    Those branches look like they are pretty much ring barked - so does the trunk in one of them, meaning the tree would usually die. Cut it down, or cut it back to the stump and let new branches grow. That style of tree is called a pollard - they used to cut them off a bit higher tho - 8-12 foot off the ground, so grazing animals could not reach low branches and eat them and the leaves.

    Because the tree you have bushes out so low, its like a squirrel main road - it is so easy for them to climb as they have so many climbing branches. I would then remove anything from the garden that could hold the fungus, give the place a couple of months and buy in a new tree from good stock. Even if you kill the fungus in your tree, its still pretty much fucked as it is weak and susceptible.

    That tree in particular is pretty much fucked. We'll probably remove it in the spring if it doesn't sprout leaves. My husband is going to help me apply the fungicide this weekend (we need to buy a ladder so we can get the tops of the trees. The tree is actually called an aus tree which are shit trees prone to problems. The previous owners of the house planted them.

    I've been working on fixing the landscaping. Like the stupid walkway is going to be taken out. I'm moving the rocks away from the tree bases. I'll be putting edging a few feet away from each tree & putting mulch in. The grass in the backyard is a little sparse but I'll seed it again this fall. The grass in the front yard looks fantastic. Work in progress.

    Oh yeah, the fungus on the trees is called fireblight, an arborist came out to look at the trees & told me that. We're going to treat all of the trees & hope to save most of them.
    ITT OP thinks squirrels do things they don't :facepalm:

    I've actually seen them eat the bark off the trees.
  • ShadyTrollShadyTroll Regular
    edited August 2011
    Maxstats wrote: »
    Got to Home Depot and buy a Have-A-Heart trap. Squirrels love peanut butter and cat food so inside the trap put either of those mixed with rat poison. The squirrel will get trapped and eat all the food in the trap and then by the next day he'll be dead. Drop his body into a trash bag and repeat with the trap until you stop catching squirrels. Worked for me. I killed 8 squirrels in my yard this way and now I don't have a problem with them anymore.

    Thanks for the info. Questions. Why the trap? To control where it dies? I'm thinking about just putting the poison mixed in with peanut butter on a plate & will see if the squirrels eat it.
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